What lies beyond?
by Jellicos
Summary: Transfiguration class is not the same as it used to be. Will Hermiones love ever be returned, or will McGonagalls past simply destry her?[HermioneMcGonagall] COMPLETE!
1. This is the dawn of realisation

So this is it.  
My debut as a fan fic writer. Quite exciting actually:)  
This is just a first chapter. Please let me know what you think!  
(I know the pairing is odd, but it was all the more exciting that way)

**Chapter one: This is the dawn of realisation**

"Aaah! This is just redicilous!" Hermione plunged back into the deep red armchair in the Gryffindor common room tilting her head back and covering her face in her hands.  
Harry and Ron who'd been deep into conversation about the Weasly twins new inventions stopped in mid track at their friends outburst.  
"Look, if you're that-" Ron started but she cut him off, knowing that he'd say the same thing he'd been saying for the past week.  
"No Ron, I'm not asking for help. This is just stupid. I should be able to grasp this. I mean, it's not brainsurgery or anything." She sighed in frustration.  
"Brainsurg-wha´?" Only Ron could look that confused. But before Hermione could take her frustration out on Ron, Harry quickly intercepted.  
"Don't ask." He said to his friend then turned to Hermione. "You're working yourself too hard. Nobody gets it."  
"Personly I think McGonagall is having some sort of fit. I mean honestly!" Ron looked from Harry to Hermione. "How are we supposed to memorize all these incantations and wand movements anyway. It's just insane!"  
"It's not insane." Hermione muttered back. "We knew this year would be much harder-"  
"But if _you're_ having problems with it, what hope do we have?" Ron was not about to give in.  
"I'm NOT having problems with it!" She argued, though she'd just proved otherwise. "I'm just...frustrated, that's all." She was not trying to convince the boys as much as herself. She _was_ having problems. For the first time since she started at Hogwarts she found herself at a total loss. She just didn't understand it! Her other classes where doing very well, even potions for christ sake. But when it came to this years transfiguration class, she had no idea what to do. And there was no way she could afford anything but the highest grade right now. Her future depended on it. Depended on this stupid book she just couldn't understand! She slammed her hands against the open book, making two second year students in the far corner of the room jump slightly.  
"Just ask McGonagall for help would you." Ron ignored the angry look he recieved at that comment.  
"You're the last person to give advice on schoolwork." As the bitter words excaped her lips she imediatly regretted saying them.  
"Fine. Don't pass then." Angrily the redhaired boy collected his things and made his way up to the boys dormitory.  
"Ron! I'm sorry, I -" Hermione started, but he'd already slammed the door behind him.  
"Harry..?" She pleaded. And as the designated peacemaker between his two friends, Harry just sighed.  
"I'll talk to him." He said, packing up his things as well. "But at least concider talking to McGonagall. It couldn't hurt." Hermione gave him a reluctant nodd before he too vanished into his dormitory. She lunged back into the chair again with a deep sigh.  
Maybe they where right, she tought, though imagine taking advice from Ron was a bit much for her to digest at the moment. Just talking to McGonagall didn't have to be interprited as a defeat. She could maybe get some pointers from her professor to help her in her studies. Yes, that she could do. It wasn't like she was saying she couldn't do it. No, she just needed a little guiding, that's all. She could do the rest herself. And she really needed that top grade.  
As she started packing her books into her bag she decided. She would talk to Professor McGonagall the next day after class, just casually ask for some pointers.  
As she felt at peace with her new desition, she left the common room to the two second graders whispering in the corner and went off to bed.  
But something kept her up, even after hours of turning and tossing in her four-poster bed. A strange feeling in her stomach she couldn't quite place. She knew it was familiar, she'd felt it before. But she was to tired and to annoyed to piece the puzzle together.

She hadn't even noticed that she'd slept at all that night. But Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil where all to eager to let Hermione know that she'd been moaning in her sleep.  
Well, at least I got some sleep then. She tought, noticing that she was already in a bad mood.  
The rest of the day did seem to lighten her spirits a great deal. As Professor Flitwick ended the first lesson of the day by giving her a glowing praise for her work in charms, only to be topped when she got an "O" on her essay in magical history. And since the better part of the class had failed miserably in the same task, her grade was ever so much sweeter. Though she felt a sting of shame at that tought, she knew she'd earned it.  
But as she walked into transfiguration class with Harry and Ron on either side of her, she felt the knot in her stomach from the night before return in a second.  
It stayed with her all through the class, and at the end she was so frustrated she decided to ignore her pride and talk to her professor.  
As McGonagall ended the lesson with a pile of homework, a muttering crowd started walking out the classroom doors.  
Ron was quietly raging over the homework as they passed Hermione.  
"Coming?" Harry had turned around to ask Hermione as he noticed she hadn't joined them.  
"I'll meet you at lunch." She said somewhat distracted. "I need to speak to professor McGonagall." Harry gave her an aproving smile and dragged Ron with him out the door, knowing full well that his redhaired friend had a few jokes on the way about Hermione asking for help.  
She took a deep breath before approaching her teachers desk where McGonagall was sitting, her eyes focused on the stack of parchment infront of her. Hermione took a quick moment to observe the woman at the desk. She was indeed the model of a distinguished professor. Though her age was marked in fine lines in her face and particularly around her eyes where the half-moon glasses seemed to magnify them, as well as several grey strains in her auburn hair, neatly tied up in a tight knot, her beauty was obvious. Her perfect posture was only enhanced by her emerald green robes and as Hermione stood there, a pair of surprised eyes in just the same colour as the robes, glanced at her from over the rim of the reading-glasses.  
"Yes, ms Granger?" McGonagall had acknowliged her precense and Hermione strugled for a split second with her words.  
"Professor, I was hoping I might have a word." She said in her most respectful voice.  
"Certainly." McGonagall removed her reading-glasses and made a gesture to the chair in front of her desk. "Please have a seat." She said before laying her hands together on her desk as to show her pupil that she had her full attention.  
The strange feeling in the pit of her stomach grew as Hermione took her seat opposite her professor. As the older woman looked at her with a concerned gaze, she knew that this feeling had nothing to do with her class.

She'd walked to the great hall in a trance like state and didn't even notice her surroundings until Harry poked her in the ribs at the Gryffindor table.  
"Ouch!" She protested, holding her side.  
"Sorry." He looked guilty for a split second before he remembered why he'd poked her in the first place. "You didn't answer my question." He reminded her.  
Hermione looked at him as if he'd asked her to pass the fried hippogrif.  
Ron sighed.  
"Where've you been? He's asked you like three times how it went with McGonagall." Ron said irritably and looked at her with some suspicion.  
"Oh." Hermione flushed a bit, realising she'd been playing the scenario over and over in her head since she'd left McGonagalls classroom. "Actually it went very well." It didn't take her long to restore her know-it-all attitude she was so well known for.  
"And..?" Harry urged her on.  
"_And..._" she continued a bit frustrated at their nosyness. "...I'll be going for tutoring twice a week." She wasn't that happy about reveiling this last part to her friends, but as she suspected they missinterpreted her reason for it.  
"_You_'re going for extra classes?" Ron gaped at the news.  
"Stuff it Ron." She muttered back angrily.  
"No, I'm just-" he tried to explain himself. "If _you_ have to take extra classes, the rest of us are really screwed."  
"I don't _have_ to take extra classes Ron, I just.." She trailed off, not knowing how to finish the sentance she'd thrown out in pure anger. It was the truth though. She'd realised that as she spoke it. But she'd never let her friends know that.  
"Then why-?" Harry started but she cut him off.  
"Because if I don't ace this class I can kiss my Auror career goodbye." She said a little too harshly. A quick glance at the boys made her realise she'd stepped over the line. "I'm sorry guys," she sighed.  
"Don't worry about it." Harry said, giving her a careful smile.  
"Yeah, we know how serious you are 'bout this." Ron continued.  
"Sorry we pushed you." Harry added with genuine regret wich stung Hermione more than she wanted to admit. But she hadn't lied to them. She just hadn't told them everything. There was a big difference, wasn't there? Anyway it didn't matter much now. She had her first tutorial with McGonagall that same evening and just the thought of it brought a small smile to her lips.

What in Merlins name was she doing?  
She'd been on her way up to McGonagalls office and caught herself straightening out her robes and hair in the dormitory mirrors. 'Would you get a hold of yourself!' She argued with her reflection. As she'd been talking to her professor earlier that day, she'd realised something about herself. Subconsiosly she'd probably known for a while, but as she sat there, trying to form words as McGonagalls wise green eyes surveyed her, there was no question about it anymore. She was never in the lack of words. On the contrary, Hermione was often known to say _too_ much. But in that moment, her mind went blank. It had been doing that a lot lately, especially in transfiguration class. She had assumed it had to do with her worry about the Order. After all, she was very involved now and McGonagall was the one who she could count on to let her know if anything had changed. But she knew that wasn't it. She couldn't have cared less about the Order when her professor had layed a comforting hand on hers, telling her she would do her very best to help Hermione get the grade she wanted so badly.  
It was that hand. The soft touch of a hand that had been in too many battles. 'Stop being redicilous.' She scolded herself. She was to focus on her schoolwork, and that was that. With a final glance in the mirror, she brushed of as much of these toughts as she could before picking up her books and walking out of her dormitory.  
Five minutes later she was standing in front of the door to McGonagalls office. She was just in time and her hand shook slightly as she knocked on the solid mahogony door.  
For a few moments no respons was heard and she lifted her hand to knock again, when a strickt voice of authority rang through the wood.  
"Come in." Hermione took a deep breath before opening the massive door.  
Minerva McGonagall was sitting at her desk as usual, with a quill in her hand and a stack of papers infront of her. Hermione wasn't sure if she was imagining the slightly flushed colour in her professors face, because within seconds it was gone.  
"Sit down ms Granger." She said in a distracted voice without looking up at her visitor. Hermione was getting nervous. She cursed herself for it. It wasn't like she hadn't been in this office a hundred times before. Professor McGonagall was not only the head of the Gryffindor house, she was also a fellow member of the Order and she'd helped both her and her friends through their years at Hogwarts as they always seemed to get themselves into trouble. She knew most of this womans expressions by now. She could read her by the tone in her voice even. And that was probably the reason she was so nervous now, since the woman at the desk showed no expression or even the slightest hint of emotion in her voice.  
But when she sat down and McGonagall finally looked at her, Hermione desperatly wished she hadn't. The elderly womans eyes where all but expressionless and the sudden warmth and sadness they showed struck such a cord in Hermiones heart she could have wept at the spot. McGonagall must have seen the change in the girls face since it took her less than a second to find her usual tone of calm and protective dicipline.  
The sudden change bothered Hermione slightly, but she couldn't quite figure out why.  
"I see you brought your books." McGonagall made a slight gesture to the books Hermione had tightly pressed against her chest.  
"Uh, yes." Hermione still cursing herself for not being able to talk like a normal person in her professors precense.  
"Let's get started then, shall we."  
Hermione wasn't surprised when the lesson was a complete falure on her part. Her words got stuck in her troat and her wand movements where a total disaster.  
"No, no, no." McGonagall had a patience worthy of a preeschoolteacher. They had been working for an hour now and yet her best student still couldn't master the basic wand movement. Hermione felt so stupid, but McGonagall reassured her every time.  
"Look carefully this time." With an elegant gesture she voiced "_Protean_" and where there a second ago had been four copper chalices, there where now three and one very confused parrot. In another gracefull movement she'd turned the parrot back into a chalice.  
"I know you can do this ms Granger," she was looking at her young pupil with confidence. But there was something else in her look as well. Hermione couldn't place it, but it made her head so very light that the task at hand seemed both impossible and so incredibly unimportant. They gazed at each other for a moment before McGonagall -as if startled by something- gained her focus and asked Hermione to try again.  
She did. But her chalice was still a chalice, though now decorated with a few green feathers.  
"I don't know what I'm doing wrong." Hermione said with a concern that was not at all directed at her failed attempt on the chalice. "It's not like I haven't done this before." She muttered, as McGonagall removed the feathers with a swift movement of her wand.  
"It's not that strange that you should feel out of balance with everything that has happened this past year." The older womans voice was suddenly quite soft and warm.  
"I'm not out of balance.." Hermione looked at her shoes. "I'm frustrat-" her voice was unable to finish the sentance as she looked up to find that McGonagall was standing just a bit too close. For a brief moment their eyes met and everything frose. McGonagall was the first to break the silence.  
"It's you wand movement." She said, breaking their eyecontact but not the tention that had risen so fast between them. "Let me show you." She took Hermiones hand to help her follow through with her wand, but as she leaned closer Hermione couldn't help herself. Standing on her toes, se leaned in a bit too rough and she caught the professors lips in a hungry kiss. McGonagall tumbled back a bit by the impact, but neither of them broke the kiss. Instead it was returned, awkwardly at first, then with a passion so deep Hermione felt the floor vanish from under her feet. She'd caught her professor completely by surprise, yet there was no denying that her longing was returned. It was as if her body would burst with sensation as their tounges met and she could not hold back a slight moan. Then McGonagall backed away. Like a child caught with its hand in the cookie jar McGonagall turned away from her.  
"I'm sorry ms Granger, I don't know what got into me." She wouldn't look at her and Hermione could se her blush, but even worse, the sight that McGonagall was so desperatly hiding by turning away from her was the one that cut through her heart like a dagger. There where tears on her cheeks.  
"Professor, I didn't mean to-" Hermione started, but her desperate attempt to explain was cut short.  
"Let's just leave it at this for today." McGonagall still had her back turned but Hermione could se there where still tears falling down the professors cheek.  
"Please, I'm-" but her protests where useless.  
"Practice your wand movements untill next time." There was no defying the tone in her voice now. Hermione walked to the door, her wand hanging by her side and out of mere habit she remembered to pic up her books.  
"Goodnight professor." Her voice was but a sad whisper as she gave McGonagall one last look. When there was no reply she walked out the door and closed it carefully behind her.  
What had she done?


	2. Searching for a crack in the wall

I couldn't keep myself away from the story.  
I even played hooky today to finish:)  
**_Thank you so much_** for your reviews!  
It means the world to me to get feedback from you very talented writers out there! More, more, more, please tell me what you think)  
With best regards,  
Jellicos

**Chapter two: Searching for a crack in the wall**

As she returned to the Gryffindor common room she went straight to bed, ignoring the loud protests from Harry and Ron. She could not face anyone right now. But it seemed as though a dark and silent dormitory was the worst place of all. She kept running the events of the evening through her head. What in Merlins name had happened?  
She'd kissed McGonagall.  
And what a kiss it was. Just thinking back sent trembles down her spine. Never in her life had she felt such passion in just one kiss. Not that she'd had much experience in the matter. There had been Viktor Krum, her sort-of boyfriend from Durmstrang, and a few guys in school. But that had mainly been awkward. This had made her loose all sence of time and space. But that was not what kept her awake long after her roomates had fumbled around to dress for the night, long after she heard the soft snoring from the bed beside hers. No. What kept her up was the painful sight of McGonagall in tears.  
Had she done something wrong?  
Well, she knew kissing her professor was not in the rule book, but she'd kissed her back. Hermione had felt the longing in her kiss match her own. But then she pulled away. Why? And the tears. She'd never seen her professor cry. In all these years, through every miserable thing that had happened. Nothing had made her cry.  
But she had. Hermione had. And she couldn't stand it!  
There was no sleep at all that night. Just the image of a tear falling down a slightly wrinkled cheek.  
Just before dawn she slid into a worried sleep.

The next few days slipped away in a hazy fog. The only time she was really present was during transfiguration. Her results in class where still the same, if not worse, since McGonagall refused to look at her. Even Ron seemed to notice that their transfiguration teacher was a bit out of it, but didn't seem to mind at all. On the contrary, the entire class seemed very relieved as their homework for the day had decreased quite a bit.  
"Maybe she's just had a sudden struck of humanity?" Ron said without reflecting when in the mist of a discussion with Harry, Dean and Seamus after the class. Hermione had to use all her strenght not to slap him for that comment, but he seemed none the wiser so she merely burst out of there.  
Not knowing where to go, she just roamed the hallways aimlessly, trying to rid herself of the anger burning within her.  
"That bloody moron, where does he get of talking about humanity.." She muttered to herself so caught up in her own anger she didn't notice him until she'd almost tripped over his curled up legs.  
"Neville?" She looked at the little sobbing creature that was her friend with a careful surprise gleaming in her eyes.  
"Oh, hi." He quickly wiped his tears on the sleeve of his robes.  
"What's the matter Neville?" she asked him as she sat down on the cold stone floor beside him.  
"It's nothing" Neville was still sobbing and Hermione was not about to give in. After all, this would take her mind off the insufferable pain in her chest for a while. It took her a few moments of assurance and doubting looks before her fellow Gryffindor agreed to tell her what was bothering him so. This alone was a sure hint that whatever this was, it was not a light matter, since Neville always had confied in her without hesitation before.  
"You must promise not to tell anyone." He said without even trying to hide the desperation in his voice.  
"Of curse I won't tell anyone Neville." She said reassuringly.  
"Well, something happened this summer." Neville started, his blank stare fixed on his shoes. "I got in a fight... with some muggles. I don't even know how it happened or why, but before I knew what I'd done, I'd cast a spell."  
Hermione gasped but dared not scold him about what he'd just told her, affraid it might just break him completely.  
"What happened? What did the ministry say?" She asked him, still in chock.  
"That's the strangest thing." Neville hadn't looked up from his shoes once. "I don't think the ministry found out. I don't know how that's possible, I mean, they basically know everything that goes on. But there was no word from them. None." Finally he looked up at Hermione who by now was even more surprised. "The spell I cast... it backfired on me. I started getting dizzy and my legs cramped up. And the past months it's just become worse. It hits more often and with more force each time and I don't know what to do!" He started crying again and buried his face in his hands.  
"Neville, you have to tell Madame Pomfry." She said, a hint of desperation had slid into her voice as well as her friend had told her the story.  
"No!" Neville froze and looked at her with a terrified expression.  
"Nev-"  
"I said no!" he cut her off. "If anyone finds out about this I'll be expelled for sure!" The panic in his voice was undeniable. "I used magic outside of school, in front of muggles. There's no way they'd let me stay. And grandmother would kill me if I'd get expelled. I'm a big enough disappointment to her as it is..." He looked so utterly miserable, Hermione hadn't the heart to argue with him. Besides, he had a good reason to be scared. This was a serious matter and expullsion was not that far fetched. Not at all actually.  
"Neville," she said carefully, placing a hand on his trembling shoulder. "What kind of spell was it?"  
"That's the thing," he looked defeated. "I can't remember."  
"Don't worry Neville, I'll help you." Neville looked up at her as if he couldn't believe his ears.  
"You will? Really?" A slight thread of hope sounded from his words.  
"Of curse I will. We just need to find the spell and a way to reverse it."  
"Oh, thank you!" Neville threw himself around her neck to hug her but found his manners quite quick again and let her go with blushing cheeks. "Sorry."  
She just smiled at him. She was happy to help him. Neville had always been a good friend and he'd do the same for her in a second if she needed it. And then there was the bonus of having other things on her mind, distractions from the evening in McGonagalls office. Oh, bugger! She stood up so quickly she almost knocked Neville over in the process.  
"Neville, I'm so sorry, but I have to go. I have an appointment with professor McGonagall in ten minutes."  
"You won't tell her anything will you?" He asked in a terrified voice.  
"I told you I'd help you and I will. I'm not telling a soul." She promised, which earned her a smile from the boy, still sitting on the cold floor. "I've got to go, but we'll talk bout this later. I promise." she stressed the importance of her last words by patting him softly on the shoulder again. Then she rushed off, not knowing what to expect when she reached her destination. But she had to be there, she had to know.

She was early as she knocked on the heavy mahogony door for the second time this week. As the strict voice from her professor rang trough the door telling her to enter, she again took a beep breath before doing so. But what she saw was the last thing she'd expected.  
If she hadn't known better, she would have thought nothing had happened. McGonagall was sitting as usual at her desk grading papers and looked up at her with a polite expression.  
"Nice to see you again ms Granger." She said in a voice, a bit too casual. "Let's get right to work, shall we? I expect you've practised your wand movements for today." Hermione couldn't understand what was going on, or rather what wasn't going on. Last time she'd left her professor in tears and the days to follow McGonagall hadn't met her eye once. And now...  
"I have professor, but I think maybe we should talk-" She tried but McGonagall played her authority card quite well and directed her to the task at hand, as if she hadn't noticed Hermiones try to work things through.  
"Very good, ms Granger." She just replied. "Let's see if it will make a difference." And with a swift movement she'd condjured up the five copper chalices again and directed her pupil to the task.  
Hermione didn't argue and got to work on turning the objects in front of her into parrots. Her efforts where damped by the confusion and hurt of her professors emotionless attitude towards her, but never the less, her wand movements had improved and a very strange looking parrot appeared, missing half of its feathers and it's feet where still copper. McGonagall effortlessly turned the sad looking bird into a chalice again.  
"Much better ms Granger" she said with what Hermione couldn't interpret as anything else than a teachers encuragement. And she was less than encuraged. What the bloody hell was going on? Why was she acting like nothing had happened. Hermiones frustration grew by the second. Was she trying to hide something from her? Pretend nothing had happened as if it would all go away by itself? It didn't work that way. At least not for Hermione. She knew they'd both felt something. Hadn't they? Maybe it had just been her. But she knew something wasn't as it should be. McGonagall had kept her distance the entire time and they where at the end of their tutorial. After a while, Hermione had decided for herself that this was her professors way of telling her that by pretending nothing ever happened, they could go back to where they'd been just a few days ago. 'Stop delusioning yourself,' Hermione scolded herself angrily. 'You are just another annoying little student to her. How could you for a second think that there was any chance that this Goddess of a woman would ever find you attractive!' Her thoughts rang like soaring acid through her heart. She knew she was different from her fellow students. She'd allways been more mature, more of a grown up, and more now than ever, when she by wisardlaw soon would be titled as an adult, it _did_ make a difference. But not a difference that would matter here. Not so much of a difference that her professor would ever see her as anything but a childish student. Yet there was no denying the tention rising between them. Though it was probably just a one way deal, Hermione tought. Her stomach clinching at the thought. How could she have been so stupid? Her professor was covering for Hermiones own stupid mistake. How could she have thought there was a slightest chance her feelings would ever be returned? At this moment she was so angry with herself that she could have burst at the seems. Not the best time to be doing transfiguration it turned out, when she with a bit too much force attacked her chalice. Before she knew what had happened, McGonagall had thrown Hermione to the floor There was no parrot to replace the missing chalice. It had exploded with such force that had her professor not knocked her to the floor, Hermione might have blown them both away.  
"Are you hurt?" An uncharacteristic tremble in McGonagalls voice brought Hermione back to reality to find that she was laying on the floor, her face a mere inch away from McGonagalls. Unable to form any words, Hermione just shook her head. As she looked into those emerald eyes, all was lost. She knew there was no denying it anymore. There was something there that she'd seen just a few times before. The strict eyes of the deputy headmistress, the eyes that could pierce their way through any student, where gone. The gaze that met her made her tremble. It was the warm gaze of a passionate woman. Several strains of auburn hair had come loose from the blast, hanging down the sides of her face. The sight made Hermione gasp and in the same moment her heart ripped in half as the most painfull sadness had overcome her professors eyes. The next moment McGonagall was standing, brushing of her green robes and looking around her burnt office.  
"That was quite an explosion ms Granger." Everything had happened in just seconds and Hermione was still on the floor, not quite grasping what had just happened. She wasn't even sure which explosion McGonagall was refering to, but as she stood up to look at the damage she was quite sure. The walls had turned black, the table where the chalices had been was just ashes, and the carpet on the floor was severely burned. But it just took McGonagall a few whippes of her wand, a few incantations, and the room was back in its original state.  
"I think we best call it a day for now." McGonagall had resumed her reserved and emotionless attitude and Hermione was to confused to argue.  
"Same time next week?"  
"Yes, professor." It was no more than a whisper, but it was all Hermione could master. It seemed good enough for McGonagall though who simply gave her an approving nodd before opening the office door.  
"Goodnight then ms Granger." She appearently did not expect an answer as she shut the door behind Hermione before she could turn to bid her professor goodnight.  
Hermione leaned in against the massive door, her mind racing madly. Had she imagined it all? The warmth in her look, the sudden painfull sadness? Had it just been wishfull thinking on her part, or had she just knocked her head in the explosion?  
For a split second it accured to her that maybe it had been a crack in the wall surrounding McGonagall at all times. That she for a brief moment had seen the true Minerva McGonagall. But she brushed the thought aside. 'Silly little girl' she told herself as she started to walk back to her common room. 'When are you going to stop fooling yourself?'  
Hermione had been so caught up in her own thoughts she hadn't heard the desperate sobs coming from the other side of the door. And she was long gone when the sound of chattering glass echoed into the hallway.


	3. In the head of Minerva McGonagall

Well, here it it. A slight insight into the inner world of our dear professor McGonagall.  
Oh, and about her appearance; when I read the first HP book (_years_ ago) I somehow confused the description of Minerva McGonagall. In my mind she's therefore always had auburn hair, not black as it really is in the books. So it became auburn in this story as well. I hope you'll cope) And I hope you'll have a slight oversight with my grammar. English is my third language and though I try I don't always get it right.  
And **_THANK you_** **_so_** much for your reviews! There is no better inspiration in this world!  
Please, please keep writing! It's Christmas in june)  
Love from Jellicos

**Chapter three: In the head of Minerva McGonagall**

There where shards from the shattered vase all across the floor beneath where it had hit the wall. She wondered if anyone had heard it, but then she really didn't care. There wasn't much at all she cared about right now. Damn it! How could she have lost it so? Sitting there crying like a little girl. At least she'd waited for Hermione to leave before shedding her tears this time. Oh, dear. Hermione!  
She buried her face in her hands for a moment as if the gesture would make it all go away again. Her poor student must have thought she was completely insane. And she probably was. Oh, god. How could she have let things get so out of hand? How could she have dropped her guard so completely? Had she learned nothing?

Tormenting herself wasn't helping much so Minerva reached for her wand and swiftly reasembled the vase she had just broken. It looked like new, which in itself was kind of ironic seing how often she'd smashed that very same vase into pieces these last years.  
With some effort she walked into her bathroom. One look in the mirror was all she needed to fall the last few steps to the bottom. She looked twohundred years old. At least. True, she was no schoolgirl anymore. The years had taken their toll on her appearance. But with puffy, red eyes and hair dangling loose from what used to be a bun on her head, she looked a mess. One minute of splashing cold water on her face did little good, but her mind seemed a bit clearer now. What on earth could that beautiful young woman se in her? It was so completely beyond her, yet she knew it had to be something. Because however strange it looked to her, Hermione Granger seemed to have some sort of misplaced feelings for her.

The easiest way would be to remove the temptation. But how could she end their tutoring sessions? As much as she hated to admit it, those few hours meant more to her than she cared to admit. And yet they pained her as much.  
That sweet face, those burning hazel eyes. She couldn't bare it. And she was not about to let those memories back up.It had just about broken her completely when- No!  
She banished all thoughts about the past. It was over. The problem at hand was how to deal with Hermione, or rather her own feelings towards the young woman.

It couldn't go on like this. Hermione had a way to break through all of Minervas defences. And even if she detatched herself from all emotions completely, it all came flooding back the second their eyes met. Oh, that kiss... No. She wasn't allowed to think like that. Disregarding for a second that the woman was her pupil, there was no way she would ever allow herself to become that vunerable again. She'd done a good job at building walls around her, keeping all feelings at bay, not leting anyone close. Only Albus knew. She'd never told him, but the headmaster had a way to see through everyone. Even her. And now there was someone else who could.  
Minerva cursed her weakness bitterly as she made her way to her quarters. She knew there was no chance she would get any sleep this night, but there was not much of an option.  
Entering the school grounds would only force her to socialize with her collegues, and she was in no mood to be polite.  
She had to figure out a plan. Some way of coping with what was happening.

Their lips met once again and she gasped as a tounge slid between her parted lips. She returned the kiss with such hunger that she for a second was affraid she'd consume her lover. But her hunger was met with satisfaction and a soft hand ran up her face to loosen her hair from the tight bun on her head. As the soft hands tangled in her now loose hair, her own started to explore the warm body pressed against her own  
A Hogwarts shirt fell to the floor and as her hands started to feel their way towards the firm but ample breasts, her light touch was met with soft moans.  
"Oh, Minerva... I want you..."

Minerva was smiling. It was just before dawn and she was squirming in her sheets of pleasure. Halv awake, still holding on to the dream. It had been so long siince she'd had that dream now. Maybe that was the reason it had intensified so. Why her longing, her deep acing for it to be real was so much stronger than it had been all those years ago. She was reluctant to let the images go. It had changed somewhat, the forms, the colours, the deep desire. But she could care less. Those hazel eyes, the feel of those red, wet lips to hers, tangling her hands in that unruely brown hair...  
At once she was awake, sitting upright and frozen in her bed. Fuzzy, brown hair, hazel eyes, that voice... Oh, bloody hell! She knew the face in her dream all to well. The dream had been so much different because it wasn't the same dream at all. The reality of what she had just woken up to was too much. She had just been dreaming about Hermione Granger.  
Within seconds she was standing in her bathroom, splashing cold water on her face. It was becoming a regular ritual by now.  
How could she?  
Damn it, she was not going through that again. Not now, not ever!  
And with the war closing in on them with such force she was sure that history would be repeated if she even thought about giving in to her desires.

No. It was not worth it. There was nothing in this world that would make her go through that again.  
Yet she knew she could not bare to loose those precious moments where she could just watch the intelligent young witch and let her mind wander just a little. That was the whole reason she'd suggested that she'd tutour Hermione, knowing full well that her star pupil was more than capable of handling whatever difficulties she had herself.  
It was hard. No doubt about that.  
Every time Hermione seemed to find a way right through her defences. Minerva didn't know what hurt the most; The feelings that rose inside her for the first time in so many years, or that desperate longing she was determined never to satisfy. She'd been so closed of since it happened that feeling all those sensations rushing through her body was not just frightening, but down right painful.

Would it kill her to take this chance?  
Probably.  
Did she care?  
She wasn't sure anymore...

Minerva McGonagall changed into her robes within minutes, her hair in the same strict bun as always. As she went down to the head table in the great hall for breakfast, she still did not have a plan.


	4. The Plan

It will be a short while before I can update again, so I wanted to post a short something to you lovely people out there. It's not great, actually it's not even that good at all. But the message is clear I hope.  
And yes, Hermione just might have a plan.  
Everything will be revealed in due time my dears)  
And as of the next update I _will_ spend extra time correcting my spelling. I promise.

Enjoy, and please review! I love to hear what you think!

Love from Jellicos  
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**Chapter Four: The plan**

They'd spent every free hour in the library the past few days, searching for an answer to Nevilles growing problem. Hermione even spent her lunch hour helping him for which he was grateful to the point of tears. She didn't have the heart to tell him that she had other reasons for skipping lunch. Breakfast had been hard enough, seeing her professor at the head table chatting with her colleagues and never noticing the desperate glances from Hermione.  
Neville was buried in huge piles of books that Hermione had picked out for him to scan through for any information. Thankfully that gave her some time to think. Something she'd been trying to avoid for some time now.

Her last tutoring session with McGonagall had been a disaster. The transfiguration part had gone quite well actually and she'd had to master every muscle in her body not to confess everything as McGonagall had patted her shoulder.  
"Your work has improved immensely. You will not be needing my help much longer." She'd said with what had looked like a proud smile. But Hermione wasn't sure. There was always something hiding in the back, behind that brick wall she kept up in front of her. Something that made Hermione feel that aching desire and love, but also a pain filled sadness that pierced through her heart every time. She didn't know what that could be, what her beloved professor was so desperate to hide from her, but she was determined to find out. At any cost. Well... almost.

She looked over at Neville, who sighed in frustration. But as he saw her looking, he quickly gave her the most grateful smile and dove into the book in front of him.  
It was strange, so very strange.  
Why hadn't the ministry intervened?  
How could they not know?  
Or maybe they did know?  
But that did not make sense either. If they did know, they must have known about the spell backfiring and the effects it would have.  
They would at least have reversed the spell, wouldn't they?  
None of it made any sense at all.  
And worse yet was that they'd been through almost half the spell books in the library without coming any closer.

She had managed to cover when Neville had a fit in Professor Sprouts herbology class.  
It was clear these side effects where getting stronger. Neville had to use every effort to stay conscious. Much to the joy of the Slytherin students who thought the Gryffindors sudden lack of leg control had to do with the flesh-eating slugs they where assigned to remove. Needless to say there was nothing further from the truth. After Hagrid had placed them in the greenhouse in their second year to protect the Mandrake root they needed, Neville had helped in taking care of them. But now they where too many and the seventh graders got the privilege to try and capture the biting slugs.

"Hermione, where have you been?" She was pulled out of her thoughts when a voice echoed in her ear. Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil, both seventh year Gryffindors and Hermiones dorm mates, where suddenly sitting by her side. She saw Neville blush a little at their sudden company, but he kept on reading  
"I've been studying with Neville. What's going on?" She looked at the excited girls with obvious suspicion, knowing full well that whatever would get these girls so excited, would hardly bring her much joy.  
"The seniors autumn ball!" The girls almost yelled, causing Hermione to hush them down as she looked over her shoulder.  
"Sorry," Parvati said.  
"They just announced it! It's going to be in three weeks. Oh, this is the most important night ever!" Hermione tried hard not to frown at Lavenders giddiness about a stupid ball.  
"Well, next after the graduation ball that is." She continued, and as the topic came to include boys, dress robes, dates and make-up, Hermione stopped listening. Unless Minerva McGonagall asked her to the ball there was not much about the subject that didn't depress her. And _that_ dream was never to come true. But she had to find out what lay hidden in the eyes of her lovely professor. She had to know what-  
"Hermione?" The irritated voice of Lavender Brown rang through her thoughts and brought her back to the library.  
"Hmm?" She looked at her with dreamy eyes that seemed to light a spark in Lavenders eyes.  
"Who is he then?" She demanded to know.  
"Who?" Hermione looked witch confusion at her.  
"Oh, don't give us that!" Parvati joined in. "Who's the bloke you're going to the ball with?"  
"Yeah, the one who puts that dreamy expression on your face."  
Hermione blushed which just put more fuel on the Gryffindor girls' fire.  
"No, there's no- I mean, I haven't got a date for the ball." As the girls beside her frowned she decided logic would be the easy way out. "Besides, didn't they just announce the ball today?"  
Lavender and Parvati exchanged looks as if they'd been defeated in battle.  
"Fair enough." Lavender said. "But we know that look Hermione, and we're going to find out who he is." She smiled and looked as if she'd just entered a treasure hunt. "Come on, Parvati."  
"Talk to you later." Parvati said to Hermione as both girls walked out of the library, heads together as if planning in secret.  
Hermione sighed deeply. That was all she needed right now, Lavender and Parvati lurking about, trying to find out who had stolen her heart. Wouldn't they be surprised if they found out. A miscevous grin played a moment on her lips.

"It's Ron, isn't it?" Neville looked at her with a sort of giddy expression that she never remembered seeing on his face before.  
"No, it's not Ron." She said dryly. "I don't have the energy to think about boys this year. Frankly, I think this ball is a big waste of time."  
"But you _are_ going aren't you? I mean you sort of have to, being a prefect and all." Neville looked up from his books as if this subject meant more to him than the spell.  
"I suppose." She hadn't really thought about it, but yes, she was probably expected to go. McGonagall would be there and- Oh, stop it! She cursed herself quietly. Although...  
"Well, I just thought.. I mean if you don't have someone in mind that is.." He had a hard time finding the words that suddenly seemed to big to fit into his mouth. "I just thought that.. well.. maybe we could go. You know, as friends that is." Neville blushed so hard that no one but Hermione could have missed it.  
"Actually, that doesn't sound bad at all. Let's do it." She said, as a plan was starting to form in her head. No, that wasn't a bad idea at all.  
Hermione interprited Nevilles relief at her acceptance as gratitude that he would not have to go to the ball alone. She didn't even contumplate that the plan forming in Nevilles head was very much like her own. They would be the perfect pair. Both acting as a cover for the other.  
They shared a secret glance. Hermione felt no guilt what so ever, as Neville had confessed his love for someone else to her earlier that day. This way they could both persue what they wanted without anyone else getting hurt. Yes, this was definatly the way to go about it.  
"You know Neville." She said in a soft voice. "I think this autumn ball will be the best ever."


	5. Taking the first plunge

Hey everyone!  
I'm sorry about all the spelling errors in this piece. My computer sort of broke down...  
Anyway, I hope you like it, and please let me know if you do! (or if you don't)  
To **fen-rei**; Yes, I have thought of that:) wink  
And to all of you, The answers will come soon enough... patience my darlings:)  
And again, **_thank you all reviewers!_** I don't know what I'd do without you:)

All my best to you  
And LOTS of hugs!  
-Jellicos

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**Capter five: Taking the first plunge**

The past week the hallways had been buzzing with all the latest gossip about the coming ball, girls where giggling and boys looked terrified. Who was going with whom was the biggest topic. Hermione couldn't care less. There had been a time when she would have hoped for her friend Ron to ask her to be his date, but that was long ago now. A lifetime it seemed. Though he dind't waste any time arguing with her about it.  
"Neville!" He couldn't believe his ears when she'd told him.  
"Oh, honestly Ron!" She sighed and looked at him as if he where five. "What's the big deal? It's just a ball."  
"I just... you know.." He squirmed and his face flushed so bad it was hard to distinguish his face from his fiery red hair.  
"No, I don't know." She said angrily, starting to get fed up with his childishness. But she did know. "What's wrong with Neville then?" She was not about to budge, but she wanted the focus taken of the path he was leaning towards.  
"Nothing! That's not what I.. -Harry!" He turned distraught to his best friend for help.  
"Sorry mate, you're on your own." Harry said, pretending to read his divination homework. He'd promised himself not to get in the middle of his friends little spats again, even though he truly felt sorry for Ron this time.  
Ron looked at them both, Harry not meeting his eye, and Hermione glaring at him, daring him to say another word. In a fit of rage he gathered his things and stormed up to the dormitory, slamming the door so hard it almost shook the common room.

"You know he still cares for you." Harry had put down his book and looked at Hermione who seemed much less angry now, but still as determined.  
"Well, he's too late this time." She replied in her most matter-of-fact voice, still not hiding that she felt bad about it.  
"What?" Harry looked at her for a second as if thinking. "No! Neville?" He stared at her in disbelief.  
"Oh, don't be stupid Harry!" Why where all of her friends such morons some times?  
"But.. then who?"  
"I can't tell you yet." But as Harry opened his moth to say something she continued. "And don't tell Ron a thing. It's better if he thinks I'm dating Neville right now. You'll both find out soon enough, I promise." She added and Harry stopped trying to protest.  
"Fine" he said, obviously not happy with her answers.  
"Harry, it's not that I don't trust you, you know that! It's just..." Suddenly all the strenght was gone from her face and she looked as if she was going to break down in tears any moment. Harry who'd started collecting his things dropped them in pure surprise. He'd never seen his friend that lost before and fell down in a chair beside her.  
"I know you trust me." He started, not knowing what to say. "I just wish I could help, you know." At these words the wall broke and she started to cry. Startled, Harry had no idea what to do. Should be say something funny? No, that would be the most stupid thing he could do. He decided placing an arm around her would be a wise choice, but before he could act, Hermione had rushed up to her dormitory, still crying.  
Harry was as confused as ever. What had that been all about? What was he supposed to do now? Even if he knew, he couldn't get up to the girls dormitories anyway. He looked at the table where all of Hermiones books still layed open. Now he was worried.

She'd trown herself on her stomach in her four poster bed, burying her head in her pillows. The tears that had been threatining to surface these past few weeks where coming out with such force she couldn't stop them anymore.  
What was she thinking anyway? Going to the ball with Neville so that she could swep her transfiguration teacher off her feet? Yeah, that was brilliant!  
She didn't know a thing right now. She was in love with her professor -yes, in love- there was no point in denying that anymore, She'd hurt one of her best friends and whatever it was that lingered on in McGonagalls past _she_ was the one who kept pulling it out of her, making her cry. Damn it! She could have slapped herself for that! Just the memory of her professor in tears tore her appart like nothing she'd ever imagined.  
As the dormitory started to fill up, Hermione pretended to be asleep, weeping in silence untill she dozed off.

The next day, even Harry and Ron noticed that something was off in transfiguration class. Usually they wouldn't have minded at all, but this was getting to be a growing habit. When McGonagall didn't lecture them for trying to get their bunnies to race (with no real result) instead of turning them into vases, Harry knew something was afoot. Even Ron reacted with some concern when Hermiones vase started wiggeling its fluffy ears at him, but his concern was as usually completely missdirected as he started asking Hermione if she was feeling ill.  
Harry was probably the only one who noticed the tention, the glances -or lack there of- between his star pupil-friend and his usually so strict transfiguration professor. McGonagalls classes where always a perfect example of good student behaviour, but these past lessons had been a growing chaos. But as he looked at Hermione he decided to mind his own business. He now knew what she'd been talking about the previous night. He should have known, should have seen it comming. He hated seeing his friend so heartbroken, but he knew there was nothing he could do. Judging by Professor McGonagalls behaviour Harry could tell she was not unaware of it either.

Hermione didn't notice Harrys glances. Nor did she give a slightest attention to the ears on her vase. She pretended to however. But her gaze was fixed on her professor, her longing sences taking in every line and form of the gorgeous woman as they could master. She did notice McGonagall desperatly trying everything not to look in her direction. Something that Hermione noticed she took both pleasure and pain in. It confirmed that there was something, but it also confirmed that it was something that her professor was not about to let happen.  
As the bell rang she had to be nudged by Harry in order to realize that class was over. But the sight stayed with her the rest of the day.

The day had been a torture after that, right until six o'clock when she found herself outside the heavy wooden door that lead to McGonagalls office. Now she was struck by a sudden attack of panic. Was she really going to go through with this?  
Well, she wasn't about to change her mind now. She'd been standing in front of her mirror for an hour and backing out was not much of an option as she stood infront of her professors door in a soft blue summer dress instead of her robes and uniform.  
The second she'd knocked on the door she felt like running in the opposite direction, but as she walked in the door all her doubts where gone.

Minerva McGonagall didn't know if she'd dreaded this meeting more than longing for it. Her dreams had become more vivid by the night, and her classes with Hermione Granger had become almost unbarable. Her young student showed very little restraint when it came to observing her in the classroom. Minerva couldn't pretend that she was unaffected by it. Actually it took most of her self controll not to give in to all her urges, which obviously affected her teaching. She had to deal with this, once and for all. And when the knock on her door came right on time, she'd made up her mind. But as the door opened her mind turned blank in a second.

McGonagall had met her eye as she'd walked in and the sight before her almost threw Hermione of her feet. Her professor sat as usuall at her desk, but her usually piercing green eyes had turned darker and Hermione was once again met with the deeply passionate gaze that sent tiny fireworks to explode in her chest.  
This time it didn't fade, but McGonagall averted her eyes as she stood up.  
"That's quite a fetching dress ms Granger." Her voice was slightly darker than usual and Hermione could tell there was a lot of effort put into uttering these words.  
"Why thank you Professor." Hermione replied, not trying the slightest to hide the flirtatious tone in her voice. McGonagall was slightly thrown by this boldeness but she walked towards Hermione using all her might to remain casual and professional, knowing full well that her intelligent pupil had seen through her a long time ago.  
"Special occation?" She hoped to god her voice sounded as steady as usual.  
"In a matter of speaking..." As McGonagall come closer Hermione found it hard to breath, let alone utter full sentances.  
"Ms Granger I really think we should-"  
"Don't.." Hermiones voice was just above a whisper, but it stopped McGonagalls train of thought completely. "I can't stand this any longer..." The deep hunger in the young womans shaking voice was too much for McGonagall. Her walls had been torn down by a few words and a blue summer dress. Hermione walked the final steps towards McGonagall who made no effort to stop her as she pushed the older witch up against the wall and leaned in to meet her lips. The sensation was mindnumbing. The earth could have shattered around them and they wouldn't have noticed. As Hermione felt the soft lips against her own there was no other concern in this world. Her kiss was met with such hunger and she could not hold back a soft moan as McGonagall parted her lips and Hermione slid her tongue in. She still held her professor pinned to the wall as their tongues eagerly caressed every inch of the others. As she softly slid her hands down her professors arms and down her sides McGonagall lost what little selfrestraint she had left. She drew her attention away from those addictive plumb lips to kiss the young womans neck and collarbone.  
"Oh, Minerva.." Her husky voice was barely audiable though the deep moan, but the sound of her name from Hermiones lips sent shivers down her spine. She'd never loved her own name as much as right now. As the hands of her beloved professor slid down her dress, she skillfully opened the clasps on McGonagalls robes. The sight of the white silky undergarnmets through the open robes triggered something in her and she slid a hand to the soft breasts, still covered in fabric.Minerva gasped at the touch and Hermiones moans grew loader.  
"Oh god, Hermione we shouldn't.." But Minervas protest was cut short with a deep moan as Hermiones hands found their way through the fabric and started caressing her stiff nipples.  
"Why?" Hermione whispered in her ear, before nibbling on it.  
"I'm... You are my student and I... I have certain... duties... to... I can not take.. advantage.. Oh, god.." Her half hearted reasoning was muffled with gasps of pleasure.  
"In case.. you missed it.. Minerva.." Hermione was panting and her soft whisper was deep with lust. "I'm the one seducing you..."  
The last thoughts of reason had vanished from Minervas thought as Hermione touched her body in ways she never knew possible.  
It took the Hermione some time to get all the pinns out from Minervas strict neck-bun, but she got her reward as the silky auburn hair finally loosend and fell in soft waves around her face and down her shoulders.  
"You really are a Goddess." Hermione gasped at the sight and Minerva leaned in to kiss her again, her hungry lips still wanting more. The younger witch broke the kiss, concentrating on kissing her way down Minervas neck with the destination her hands where still exploring under the satin fabric.  
Minerva moaned loadly at the treatment. She wasn't completely inexperienced, she'd been married once after all. But at the soft hands of the young brunette she might as well have been. She hadn't felt anything remotely like this since... Oh, God no!  
Minerva pulled away with such force, Hermione almost slammed into the wall.  
As she reached out her hands as not to collide with the massive wooden wall Hermione found herself more confused than ever. She turned to look at her professor who was standing at her desk with her back to Hermione, tightening her robes.  
"Minerva, wha-?" But there is was again. The sight that had kept her up so many nights and torn her chest apart. Minerva McGonagall was leaning on her desk, not able to hide her sobs. Hermiones first instinct as she got over the shock was to hold her and comfort her. But Minerva beat her to it.  
"I'm sorry Hermione. I shouldn't have.." Her voice was so fragile, but Hermione noticed Minervas strong efforts to stabilize it. Before she could protest, Minerva continued. "I think it's best we end our tutorial sessions."  
"I'm sorry, I didn't-" Hermiones voice was high from panic. Was she just going to leave it like this?  
"You didn't do anything wrong ms Granger." Minervas voice had resumed some of its cool authority again.  
'Ms Granger?' Hermione thought distraught. No. No, she didn't just...  
"The fault lies with me, and me alone." Minerva McGonagall continued, still having her back turned made it easier for her to say what she needed to say without seeing the pain she knew was evident in the young womans face. "Therefore it is also my responsibility to make sure that nothing like this will ever happen again." She knew her words must have hit Hermione like a shot through the heart. But the hurt they had caused herself was even greater. Minerva felt she would literally burst from the pain at any moment, but she had to do this, there was no other way."As of now our sessions are finished and I would think it best if you returned to your dormitory at once."  
Hermione just stood there for a second, not able to move, but as the pain that had risen in her chest prevented her from being able to utter a single word, she made her way to the door. With one last glance upon the figure in front of the desk, still with her back turned, but with her trademark posture intact, Hermione walked out of the office.  
Minerva McGonagall made sure her student was at a safe distance from her office before she broke down and fell to the floor, sobbing.


	6. “And the truth shall set you free”

I have a confession to make... I do enjoy teasing you, my dear beloved readers. Thankfully, there is nothing in the law book about cruelty to fictional characters. If there where, I'd be in trouble:) And yes, it's true **fan-rei**... I am slightly evil;-) And I'll probably let you hang a few times more in the chapters to come. But fear not, your patience will be rewarded. Minervas secret is about to see the light of day... So read and review my darlings!

Love,  
Jellicos

And to **Death of the Endless**: I'm expecting cookies;-)

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**Chapter six: "And the truth shall set you free..."**

She wasn't there. Not really. She went to class, but didn't say much. She sat with her friends at dinner, but didn't eat. Hermione had lived the past week in a trance like state. She couldn't feel anything any more. And she didn't care. Nothing seemed to matter.  
Harry and Ron where at their wits end. They had tried everything, but their friend was too far out of reach. Even Draco Malfoy seemed annoyed at her state, since none of his excellent crude insults had the slightest affect on her. She didn't even seem to notice his existence, which in Dracos world was unforgivable.  
But he wasn't in her class during transfiguration. It was no longer just Harry who noticed that something was wrong during class. Hermione looked as if she died a little, every time she stepped into the classroom. And Professor McGonagall seemed to be on the verge of a new break-down every time she glanced in Hermiones direction. She never did break down though. Professor McGonagall never would. At least not in the presence of her students.  
Harry wanted to say something, anything, to get his friend back. But he couldn't think of a single thing that would help.  
So Hermione did as she'd done since leaving her professors office that evening more than a week ago. She kept to herself, not thinking, not feeling, hardly saying a word to anyone.  
She'd taking the habit of strolling the corridors, finding the most secluded spots in the castle to hide from the questioning gazes.  
It was in one of those places she was sitting this Thursday afternoon. Classes where over and she had escaped not to have to be forced into any social events by her house mates. She'd felt a slight sting of guilt, not helping Neville finding a cure for his backfiring spell. But she was too wrapped in her own misery to care for too long. She didn't know what had happened that night. Only that McGonagall had pushed her away with those teas gleaming in her eyes. Hermione couldn't stand the thought of it. What hurt most wasn't the rejection, even though it seared through her like acid trough her veins. No, it was the pain she'd caused the one she loved. She didn't know what she'd done, but it must have been horrible for Minerva to react the way she did. Minerva. The name echoed in her head. It had been to good to be true. The taste of those lips, the feel of her skin, the addicting smell of her that Hermione could still remember. Hearing that voice moaning her own name had been the most beautiful sound she'd ever heard.

Hermione was so caught up in her own thoughts that she didn't hear the voices at first.  
When she did, she froze. She knew she wasn't supposed to hear this, but she couldn't move. The sound of Minerva McGonagall sobbing rendered all her limbs useless. So she listened, even though she knew she had no right. She didn't even notice the tears falling down her own cheeks as a warm male voice reached her.

"Oh, my dear Minerva." Albus Dumbledore pulled out a hankers chief from his robes and gave it to the sobbing professor by his side. She took it and wiped the tears from her face.  
"I'm sorry Albus, I didn't mean to get so hysterical." She said trying to stop the tears.  
"I've never seen you hysterical Minerva. I doubt you have it in you." He replied with a gleam in his eyes. "Expressing your pain is a completely different matter."  
"I don't know what's wrong with me." Minerva tried to shrug the whole thing off, but Albus knew her too well.  
"It's Ms Granger isn't it?" But it was not a question, and Minerva wasn't even surprised.  
"How do you do it?" She didn't look at him. "How do you see right through me like that?"  
"I've known you for over twenty-five years." He smiled.  
"It's Lily." Her voice was just audible, but both Albus and Hermione could hear her. Only one of them understood.  
"I see." Albus voice was still warm, but now filled with deep compassion. "I take it Ms. Granger has unknowingly brought up some very painful memories."  
"It's just.." Finally Minerva looked up at him. "Oh, Albus. I cannot make that same mistake again! I don't think I would survive it."  
"What makes you think you're repeating a mistake?" Albus surveyed her, his voice revealing there was much more to it that he didn't say.  
"Oh, but they're so much alike." She looked at the floor again, as if the memories would hurt her more if she was looking at Albus when she talked of them. "I let myself fall for a brilliant student once. I'm not doing that again. I knew that Lily didn't love me in that way, but I didn't care, she was the joy of my life then. Still it was almost unbearable when she married Potter. I knew she loved him. She told me. I knew there was no future, that I would get hurt no matter what. And I could live with that. With being her friend. But then she was killed..." Minervas voice trailed off. She didn't look up until Albus put his hand on her fragile shoulder.  
"What makes you think it will be the same this time?" Albus looked at her.  
"How many reasons do you want?" Minerva looked a bit agitated as she started counting her words on her fingers. "Ron Weasly. The upcoming war. A student for Merlins sake!"  
"I see only one." Albus was still as calm as ever. "Fear."  
"Fear?" Minerva looked at him as if he'd just declared her incapable of tying her own robes.  
"You said it yourself. Lily loved James, not you."  
"Always nice to be reminded." Minerva snared at him before he could finish. But Hermione didn't see it. She'd already left her hiding place.  
"But Ms. Granger does." He continued in the same calm voice. Minerva looked up at him in disbelief. "Oh really Minerva, you must have noticed. I will not believe that my deputy headmistress hasn't seen what the entire school knows by now." He leaned closer to emphasise his next words. "Hermione loves you. With all her heart. And this is no longer about Lily, is it? You are in love with your young student and you are petrified of getting hurt again." Minerva looked as if all the strength had been washed out of her. It was the truth and she knew it.  
"Minerva.." Albus voice had suddenly become very serious. "This is your decision to make. But bare in mind what I'm about to say. Student or not, this kind of love comes but maybe once in a lifetime. Hermione knows what she wants. It's up to you now." Albus rose from his seat. He gave Minerva a pat on the shoulder before leaving her with her thoughts.

What in Merlins name did he expect her to do? Commit emotional suicide? Because she was still sure that would be the case if she let Hermione know how she felt. Her heart couldn't stand the loss, she knew it all to well. Lily and James, Hermione and Ron, and Lilys murderer regaining his former strength wanting only one thing; Hermiones best friend and Lilys son: Harry. God damn it! This was not just complicated and painful. It was plain sick! Hermione was seventeen years old! And she was... well, probably the same age as her mother. It had been different with Lily. Sure, there had been the professor/student conflict. But the age difference hadn't been that much of an issue then. She wondered what Hermione could possibly see in her. And whatever she saw... how long would it last? How long before she realised that she could have anyone she wanted and not someone who was starting to get lines around her eyes, and strains of grey in her hair.  
How long before Hermione knew she could do better and turned her affections to young Mr Weasly, or anyone else for that matter?  
But then.. how long could she hold her feelings for Hermione locked up?  
She didn't know the answer to any of her own questions.

The Gryffindor common room fell silent as Hermione rushed in. She was panting from running all the way and had to bend over and support her weight with her hands on her knees to catch her breath.  
"Neville!" She was still panting, but looked happier than she'd done for over a week. "I need to talk to you, now." Neville looked confused at her but obeyed by walking towards her.  
"Hermione, are you-" Ron started, with Harry close behind.  
"Not now." She said, while almost dragging Neville with her through the portrait hole. "Will you wait up for me? I want to talk to you both." They just nodded before Nevilles feet disappeared and the portrait swung shut.

She had practically dragged Neville behind her all the way back to her hiding place. She was sure it would be empty by now and it was. There was no sign of neither McGonagall or Dumbledore.  
Neville was breathing heavily as they sat down.  
"What's... going on Hermione?"He asked while trying to catch his breath again. "You're confusing the hell out of me. Not talking to anyone for a week, then without explanation you grab me and drag me across half the castle to talk."  
Hermione looked at him, slightly ashamed.  
"I'm sorry Neville." She said. "I've just been so miserable lately, but I think I found the answer today. For both of us." She gave him a mischievous glance but Neville just looked puzzled.  
"What are you talking about?" He just didn't get this girl sometimes.  
"Remember when you told me that you where in love with-"  
"Ssssch!" Neville hissed at her angrily while looking over both his shoulders as to see if anyone was listening.  
"There's nobody here to hear it Neville." She replied, a bit impatiently.  
"Still." Neville said, calmer, but still on edge. "No one is to find out." Hermione just sighed. "And besides," he looked a little defiant, "you still haven't told me about _your_ crush. I take it it's not Ron, because then we wouldn't be hiding back here."  
"It's Professor McGonagall." Hermione confessed, surprised at how easy it was to confide in Neville.  
"I figured as much." Neville was smiling as she looked at him in astonishment. "Oh, come off it Hermione!" He said when she just stared at him. "I'd have to be blind not to notice there's something going on between you two. I think even Harry has his suspicions." At this, Hermione froze.  
"Who knows?" She asked.  
"Nobody knows Hermione." Neville said reassuringly. "There are rumours that the two of you had a spat of some sort -you should hear the outcomes people make up!" He grinned. "But I think Harry's the only one who has the slightest suspicion about the truth. But you know him. He sees everything, but he wouldn't tell a soul." Hermione didn't know exactly how to react to all this. There where rumours! Well, at least they where way off... or kind of. She sighed again. "Besides," Neville continued. "you knew about me and... well, you know..." He blushed heavily.  
"Well, that was more of a guess... at least until I found that love letter you sent him." Neville blushed even more at the reminder.  
"Yeah, that wasn't my best idea ever." He said, looking intensely at his shoes.  
"He kept it, didn't he?" Hermione reminded him. But as Neville continued to observe his own shoes as if they where displaying a very interesting play, Hermione remembered why she'd dragged him out there in the first place.  
"Neville, I've got a plan for the ball." She said with a gleaming smirk on her face, looking more excited then Neville had ever seen her before.

The next few days leading up to the ball had sent most of Hogwarts teachers into a state of pure resignation. The seventh year students did little besides gossiping and planning for the coming ball. Only Professor Snape had a tight grip on his students during classes, but even he could not hinder a few notes exchanging hands as he taught. He had tried though, confiscating the notes and reading them out loud to the class, usually with a devastated and flushed student as a result. After ripping a note from Hermiones hands however, the contents must have struck something in him since he neither read it to the class, nor tried to hinder the passing of notes in the days to come.  
As for Hermione, she was constantly seen walking arm in arm with Neville, both with their heads close together, whispering and laughing.  
Had Harry not known better he would also be buying in to the gossip about a romance forming between the two Gryffindors. As it was, Harry had a lot to deal with Ron, who couldn't decide if he was to be jealous at Neville or happy for him. But he wasn't that concerned for Ron at this time. That concern was directed at a completely different target, and by every transfiguration class it kept growing.

Minerva had noticed, just as everybody else, that there was something going on between Hermione and Neville Longbottom. She knew she should be happy. Her problems had been solved for her. She no longer had to decide what to do about Ms Granger, or her own affections towards the girl. Hermione had found someone else. Minervas fears had become reality and Hermione had realised she could do much better than her old transfiguration professor. Yet the sight of them pierced Minervas heart like flaming spears. She knew she had no right to have these feelings, no right to lay in bed at night wishing that Hermione would just walk into her chambers and say that it was all to get her attention and that she still loved her and only her. Minerva McGonagall had no right what so ever to spend the lunch hours watching her two students with their heads together at the Gryffindor table and from her place at the honour table think of ways to hex Longbottom without Hermione knowing. But she did. She did all of this and she knew she was closing in on the edge of sanity.  
What was this woman doing to her?  
Minerva had closed of all her emotions after Lily died. It had worked rather well and she'd gained the reputation with her pupils for being strict but fair and always carrying herself with flawless dignity without emotion. When Lilys son walked into her class in his first year, looking at her with his mothers soft eyes, she'd sealed the lock on her emotions all the way. It had been painful enough when it had happened, she was not about to re-live that moment.  
But when Hermione had kissed her... Oh, just the memory was too much for her at the moment! This beautiful, bright young witch had opened the locks and Minerva was trying to stop the tide from welling out.  
Yet she knew that this was not at all like her love for Lily. No, this was something else, something much stronger, something that actually made her think of hexing her own students!

The day of the Autumn Ball didn't start that well for Hermione. She was startled out of a most wonderful dream by a loud cry. It took her a second to find her way to conciousness and stop smiling in her sleep, but as her mind registered the cry she sat up quickly and withdrew the curtains from her four poster bed. Lavender Brown was standing in front of the dormitory mirror and Parvati Patil was mumbling comforting words as she patted her friend on the back. Hermione hurried up to Lavender who now stood whining.  
"What's wrong?" Hermione asked, prepared for the worst. She'd seen much in these past seven years and it just seemed to get worse. Lavender turned to her with a terrified expression.  
"Look at my face!" She cried, and Parvati hurried to add her comfort.  
"It's not that bad Lavender, really!" She tried. Hermione looked as if she was seriously thinking of committing murder.  
"It's a few sits." She said behind clenched teeth.  
"_A few_!" Lavender looked at her in fury. "They are huge!"  
Hermione strode back to her bed and got dressed in a hurry while muttering angrily as Parvati comforted Lavender by undermining Hermiones reaction with a few not so flattering comments about her appearance.  
Hermione made sure to slam the door as hard as she could when leaving her dormitory, a gigantic bag hung from her shoulder. She couldn't believe them! She'd always known her dorm mates to be intolerable when it came to boys and looks, but this! Sure it was a ball tonight, but all that fuzz over sits? She refused to accept that she might have overreacted herself, but as she was greeted in the common room by Neville who stared at the size of the bag she was carrying, she felt a slight pinch of guilt.  
They had agreed to meet in the common room before breakfast.  
"You're early." She said, putting the heavy bag on the floor and joining Neville on the sofa.  
"So are you." He said. "I couldn't sleep." Neville paused for a minute. "Are you sure about all of this?" He asked. Hermione could tell the question had been on his mind for a while.  
"Neville, I'm not going to force you into anything." She said and laid a comforting hand on his. "If you don't want to do this, I won't hold it against you." She paused for a moment to catch his eye before continuing. "But tonight's the night, and you have to decide where your heart lies. Is he worth the fight or will you regret never taking the chance to find out?" As she looked at him, she knew she'd hit the spot. A determined expression overcame Nevilles face, making him look more grown up than Hermione had ever seen him.  
"You're right." He said  
"You're sure?" She needed him to be positive about this.  
"Absolutely." There wasn't even the slightest hint of uncertainty in Nevilles voice any more.  
"Alright then." She smiled at him. "After breakfast you'll go back to your dormitory and get our bags. The last owl from Hogsmede should be here by then. I'll take the package and meet you at the entrance to the prefect bathroom. It will be empty all day." Neville looked at her bag in slight disbelief.  
"You want me to carry that bag through the castle?" He asked.  
"It's not _that_ big!" Hermione argued.  
"What on earth did you put in it?" He was still somewhat reluctant to believe that Hermione could be carrying this large a bag if it wasn't filled with books. And he knew it wasn't.  
"Just get it up to your dormitory and let's go down to breakfast." She said in a slightly annoyed tone. "There won't be many students there this early on a Saturday, and I really don't want to miss that owl." Neville did as he was told and a few moments later the two of them where on their way down to the great hall.

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I know that everyone's busy with the new book:) Just to make things clear, I won't be changing the story to fit the new book, it's a bit too late;) Hope you'll have time to read this as well though...  
But I will keep writing a next chapter if anyone's interested (I'm **_so_** fishing for reviews right now **-**smirking-)  
And yes... I know I'm evil and I'm not telling anything else just yet)

All my best to you wonderful readers and writers out there!  
-Jellicos


	7. The myth of the Scottish temper

To my dear and loyal reviewer; **fan-rei**, this is for you ;-)  
And yes, this is just short and evil. Want the next chapter too? _-evil smirk on Jellicos lips-_  
All my love to you wonderful people who continue to read and review my story! What would I do without you?  
(well, probably not write this story)

Love, Jellicos

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**Chapter Seven: The myth of the Scottish temper...**

It was as if the students at Hogwarts had tripled over the night, at least judging by the excitement and chattering that went on all day. The fact that it was a Saturday and no lessons seemed to lighten the spirits of the students even more. Even though this ball was only for the seventh years and their dates (should they decide to ask someone younger), the rest of the students didn't seem much less enthusiastic. Some had already been asked, and others where still waiting and hoping.  
Harry had been cornered every where he went for the past days by giggling younger girls asking him to take them to the ball. Even Ron had his fair share of admirers, as both boys where well known by now for their nack to -along with Hermione- save the world now and then, and neither had (as usual) been in time to find a date.  
Parvati Patil seemed to have forgotten all about the dreadful ball during their fourth year, the one when Ron had ignored her all night and spent the evening cursing the name of Hermiones date, Viktor Krum. There was a gleam in her eye as she had cornered Ron before breakfast to ask him to the dance. Ten minutes later she'd walked away with a smug expression on her face, while Ron looked like he was about to faint. Never the less, there was a small grin on his face as well.  
Harry had dreaded this for such a long time. He knew who he wanted to take to the ball, but he couldn't. First off, he had never had much luck when it came to balls... or girls for that matter. Second... she was off limits. He'd lingered on in his dormitory to think, but since it just proved to drive him mad, he decided on heading down to breakfast. She'd be going with that Ravenclaw chap anyway, so he might as well just agree to go with whom ever stopped him first on his way to the great hall. He didn't get far though as a female voice reached him from one of the red armchairs as he entered the Gryffindor common room.  
"Oh, hi Harry." A cute seventh grader looked up at him with a courteous smile.  
'Oh, no... Not Lavender!' Harry thought. The girl would drive him mad with her giggles. But he greeted her, if yet a bit coldly.  
"Going down for breakfast?" She asked, her voice a bit bored.  
"Yeah." He replied. "Aren't you coming?" Now why did he have to ask that! Now she'd follow him down! But to Harrys surprise Lavender just sighed.  
"No, I'm just waiting for something." She said, avoiding the subject.  
At these words, Harry looked at her for the first time and noticed that she had small band-aids on several places around her nose.  
"What happened to you?" He asked.  
Lavender looked as if she would sink into her chair.  
"I.. I just had some...problems this morning." She quickly continued as Harry started to show his known paranoia. "Oh, it's nothing big! I'm just waiting for a delivery from Hogsmede that should set it right." But Harry still looked suspicious, and as it was not an alternative for Lavender to tell a boy she'd gotten sits on the day of the big ball, she tried to distract his attention. She knew this boy to well to know that he had every reason to get worried over the simplest things.  
"Did you hear about Ginny and Terry Boot?" Lavender tried. Gossip was her subject. As Harry gave her a bewildered look, she continued. "They broke up last night. Can you imagine! Just the day before the ball!" But Harry hadn't heard that last part, but ran as fast as he could through the portrait hole. At the bottom of the stairs he saw Ron, just gliding down the past few steps. Harry didn't care any more, he had to risk it. This was a sign, it had to be! Still running, he grabbed Rons arms, just stopping in time as to not knock them both over.  
"Ron! Don't hate me, but I'm asking your sister to the ball." He blurted out before he actually knew what he was saying. He was expecting a tantrum, or at least a serious scolding from his friend, but Ron just looked at him for moment, as if appraising him.  
"Fine." He said at last. "Just don't step on her toes, you're not the best dancer mate."  
Harry looked at Ron as if he wasn't sure just what to believe. But one glance and they understood each other. So Harry ran off into the great hall to find Ginny.

Hermione watched as her friend ran past her and up to Ginny Weasly, sitting a few seats away. She smiled as the scene became clear to her. 'So he finally had the guts to ask her' she thought with a smile. She knew what Ginnys answer would be. The girls'd had long discussions over the years about Ginnys crush on Harry. She didn't think her friend would have been that thick headed though, but now he'd finally got it.  
Hermione took a look around the hall that had started to fill by now and by the looks and whispers, it was no secret to anyone who she herself was going with, and that was precisely how she wanted it. The great hall seemed to fill even more with whispers and giggles as she and Neville sat there. Now and then, Hermione glanced up, pretending to be looking for the post owl, but instead her eye wandered to the empty chair that was usually occupied by Professor McGonagall. She felt a pinch in her chest, but thought quietly about the evening to come, when her plan would be set into action.  
Neville had noticed Hermiones glances and patted her on the back.  
"She'll be here tonight." He said softly and she rewarded him with a faint smile. She knew his mind was on the same track, as his eyes darted up towards the head table as well.  
The moment of silent understanding between them was broken by a herd of post owls scooping down into the great hall. Hermione looked up as a large brown owl landed at the table in front of her, knocking her pumpkin juice over. The bird was carrying a small package wrapped in brown paper and Hermione hurried to relieve the hooting owl of its burden. A very neat and fashionable label on the package revealed its contents as beauty products, but she stuffed it quickly inside her robes and turned to Neville.  
"You go off to the dormitories and I'll meet you at the prefect bathroom." Hermione whispered to to him and he just nodded and dashed away.

She hadn't got the nerves to attend breakfast along with her colleagues and students this morning. The impulse to turn Neville Longbottom into a puffy pink pillow was too strong, and she was sure that seeing him sitting close to Hermione, laughing and whispering during breakfast could very well send her off that edge.  
But there was the ball to think about. She knew she'd have to attend, and she knew that her two gryffindors would be there, dancing together. But she'd just have to deal with it, wouldn't she? She was Minerva McGonagall for Merlins sake! The strict headmistress of Hogwarts, the respected head of Gryffindor House, and well known around the country for her battles against the dark arts. She was known for her grace and emotionless intelligence, only showing that Scottish temper of hers in severe cases of rule breaking, evil or simply bad mannered students.  
But as it was, she was now feeling the verge of insanity pulling at her.  
It was just ridiculously, pure and simple. She didn't care what Albus had said that night. It had been overlooked when she'd had her relationship with Lily. She didn't know why exactly, but she reckoned Albus had something to do with it. But no matter what he'd said, Minerva knew he wasn't thrilled about the idea of another professor/student relationship. And with everything else going on, the You-Know-Who regaining power, the Order fighting for their lives, people dying and security measures being taken to the extreme. She was no longer a young woman, she had to face that. Hermione had done as Minerva had wanted, she'd found someone better. Though for the first time she wasn't sure about her star pupils judgement. She could have had anyone she wanted, and she chose Longbottom? Just the name was enough to send waves of rage down her body. He was the one who got to spend the days with her, touching that soft, milky skin, feeling her bushy brown hair between his fingers, look into the depth of her hazel eyes and taste those soft, intoxicating- No! No, no, no, no! She had to calm herself! This would not do! 'As long as I don't see him I cannot blast his head of his chubby little shoulders' she thought furiously.

She'd have the rest of the day to cool down. To find reason again and detach herself from these emotions of hers. And she was better at persuading herself not to go ballistic as she walked the hallways of the castle. She was after all a woman of logic and reason, was she not? And this was simply a matter of mind over b- But there Minerva stopped in her tracks. She had not been observing her surroundings as she walked, but there was no denying the scene that flashed before her now.  
It took her mind a split second to register the two people attempting to sneak in to the prefect bathroom together, as Hermione Granger and Neville Longbottom. But once it did, all thoughts of logic where gone. In fact all was gone from her mind except the roaring madness and fury that flamed up inside her. Before she even knew what she'd done, McGonagall had plunged forward, her eyes flashing red as she'd drawn her wand and sent a bright green light flashing through the corridor, sending Neville Longbottom crashing through the hallway.  
She didn't realise what she'd just done until she saw his limp body thrown against the wall and falling to the floor, lifeless and dripping blood.

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To **Death of the Endless : **I'm not writing the next chapter until I get my cookies:-)


	8. It's just a silly ball

Sooo, in reward for your patience and heart-warming** reviews!**  
Chapter eight is here.  
And no, there was no killing curse. But to be fare... with all that pain and anger built up, who'd have the time or self-discipline to think up a neat hex involving funny looking objects? No, with anger at it's peak you throw people across the hallway;-)  
Enjoy my beloved readers and reviewers! You are my inspiration and you keep me at my computer writing my heart out and I love you for it!  
**Mr Redfern: **Break out those dance shoes :-)

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**Chapter eight: It's just a silly ball...**

Hermione didn't know what happened. Instinctively she'd drawn her own wand to face the source of the attack, only to find herself pointing it at a petrified Professor McGonagall. Hermione looked bewildered from McGonagall to Neville and back again, before storming to Nevilles aid. It seemed several others had heard the racket as the hallway started to fill with people. Students looked horrified at the lifeless Neville, gasping in terror, nobody noticing the distraught professor on the other side of the corridor.  
"Out of my way!" Snapes voice was not as fear striking as usual, since he did no attempt to hide the slight concern in his growl as he pushed the students out of his way. But as he got through the mass of students he froze for a second at the sight. Then without a single word, he picked Neville up in his arms and carried him away. Everybody where so busy looking at the uncharacteristic behaviour of their feared potions master that they never noticed their transfiguration professor, nor their headmaster who'd led her away with him.  
Hermione was still sitting on the floor where Neville had lain, not able to move a muscle of her own. Her mind was racing as the rest of her remained numb. Had she really seen this happen? Had it really been..? But it couldn't! There was no way! Hermione was a woman of logic and reason, of fact and knowledge. It just wasn't possible that..

"I cursed a student!" Minerva McGonagalls voice was just a high-pitched croak.  
Albus Dumbledore had led his friend into his office and there had not been a word spoken while he sat her down and pored her tea, until now.  
"I am much aware of that Minerva." Said Albus. His trademark calm was present, but the seriousness in his voice was not to be mistaken. "However..." He continued as he placed his own cup of hot tea on his desk and folded his hands in front of him, watching the strict woman who'd been his devoted friend and co-worker for many years now, tremble. "Severus assures me that young Mr Longbottom will be fully restored."  
"Oh, Albus, I didn't mean to.. I don't know what happened to me. I just-" Her voice trailed off.  
"You just released all your pain and anger on a seventeen year old boy, throwing him unconscious into a wall." Dumbledore filled in. Somehow the lack of accusation in his tone made the words strike Minerva even harder. She fought the tears burning to be released and cursed the trembles in her hands. He was right, as always. Seeing Hermione and Neville had sent all her locked up emotions crashing into blind rage. She'd let an innocent boy, a student, pay for her own lack of self-control. There was no excuse in the world for what she'd done. And she knew it well.  
So with all the power she could master she uttered the words that she never thought she'd say, the words that pained her deeply, but she knew she had to say. There was no choice for her any more.  
"I'll have my resignation on your desk tonight." Her voice sounded stronger than she would have thought possible, but she dared not look at Albus.  
"I don't want your resignation Minerva." She looked at him with utmost scepticism, but Albus was still looking very serious.  
"But Albus, I-" She started, not knowing what to expect.  
"I know what you did Minerva." He cut her off. "And I'm not condoning it in any way." He paused as to make sure that the point came across, but it was very obvious that it already had, so his voice was lighter as he continued. "But the reality of the situation is that we need you here. We are yet again fighting a war and I cannot afford to lose my best professor at this time. I am of curse relying on the fact that nothing remotely like this will ever happen again."  
"Of curse not Albus!" Minerva was not sure how to react to this. She'd certainly not seen this coming. "But in all fairness, I attacked one of my own students! Surely you cannot mean that I should continue teaching? The smallest problem would be the thousands of owls you'll receive from parents."  
"I certainly expect you to continue teaching. Where would I find a more competent Transfiguration teacher?" The gleam was back in Dumbledores eyes and as Minerva opened her mouth to object he continued. "There are four people who know what really happened today. None of the students saw what happened, neither did the professors. Neville will have no recollection of the attack, which I must say is probably for the best. Severus of curse will not speak of it to anyone, and as for Ms Granger... well, I think it be best if you had a word with her yourself." As Minerva looked up, they exchanged an understanding glance of a slightly different subject and Albus was yet again very serious as he spoke."In light of all that has happened it would be wise to keep the rules between student and professor as they should be." Minerva had thought her heart could sink no lower, but she was proven wrong.  
"I must admit I'd never imagined the day when you would disappoint me Minerva." The sadness in his eyes was too much for her and she avoided his gaze. There where not many things that could make her feel more ashamed than hearing Albus utter those words. "To fall in love with a student is one thing, I am surprised I didn't see it coming sooner, but this... It it had been the act of any other professor in this school I would not have hesitated on accepting a resignation." But just as quickly as he'd turned serious, he again regained some of the light and caring voice that he was known for.  
"I trust you will find other means to express your feelings in this matter my dear." Minerva could have sworn she saw him winking at her.  
And just like that, Albus stood up to open the door for her. But she was about to pass him he said in a soft whisper.  
"I don't know what you plan on doing after this school year, with our seventh graders graduating and all. But what I do not see, I cannot object to." He smiled. "I'll see you at the ball tonight."  
And before she knew it, Minerva McGonagall was standing on the other side of the stone gargoyle, not really knowing what had just happened.

The walk back to her own quarters was the same. It was as if someone had wiped her mind blank and she'd walked the path to her chambers without thinking. But as she approached the door to her office, she came to a complete halt. Her mind raced and her heart was pumping like never before as she saw the young woman sitting at her doorstep.  
"Can I come in?" Hermione asked. Her voice was thick and by the looks of her puffy red eyes, she'd been crying. Minerva resisted the urge to embrace the fragile looking beauty and just nodded as she unlocked her door.

Hermione had gone through the scene in her head over and over for the past hours. The sight of Neville, of her beloved professor... She didn't know what to make of it all. She knew what had happened of curse, she was not stupid. But she couldn't understand.  
Just minutes before, she'd sat at Nevilles side at the hospital wing. He was awake and doing well. Madame Pomfry had not budged on the issue of having Neville staying the rest of the afternoon, but had reluctantly agreed to let him go to the ball if he was fully recovered. There was a smile on Nevilles face, unlike anything Hermione had ever seen before. A self-confident and almost euphoric smile. He had made sure they where alone before telling Hermione what had happened.  
"I woke up in his office. He was pacing back and forth, mumbling, but as I awoke, he hurried to my side and asked me how I was doing." Neville continued the story, the smile spreading, joined with a slight blush as his words made Hermiones jaw drop.  
"He was the one who made sure the ministry didn't find out about the backfiring spell this summer. He said he'd hoped I'd come to him for help." Nevilles mind had been on nothing but Snape the whole time, and the fact that someone had hexed him at school didn't seem to bother him the slightest. Hermione noticed a dark red, almost purple, spot on Nevilles neck. He didn't try to hide it but he didn't speak of it. He didn't have to. Hermione knew her friends affections had been answered and that this day Severus Snape had marked the young man as his. She wasn't sure how to feel about it. She knew Neville loved him, and she of all people understood that. But it was Snape. The man who'd brutally bullied Neville since first grade. None the less, there was nothing she could say at this moment. Snape had shown a very uncharacteristic concern for Neville, and she was not the one to judge.  
But now, as she stood in McGonagalls office watching the gorgeous older woman as she sat down behind her desk with her most characteristic Professor attitude sending them miles away from each other, Hermione wished for a second that she'd been the one stuck by the curse.  
"Have a seat Ms Granger." Minerva McGonagall sounded as professional as if talking to any student.  
Hermione did as she was told, trying desperately to hide how much it pained her to be treated as just another student.  
"I'm glad you came." McGonagall said, her voice as emotionless as her strict expression. "We need to talk about what happened."  
Hermione couldn't believe her! She was acting like nothing had happened, like they where discussing a bad grade on a paper. The hurt and anger boiled inside of her. But if Minerva was going to be cool about it, so was she.  
"I'm listening." Hermiones voice was harsh, and though Minerva had expected as much, she was not prepared for how much it would hurt. Never the less, she continued. She was determined to handle this in her most professional attitude. It was the only way she'd be able to master it.  
"Ms Ganger," As she paused to gather courage, just for a split second, Hermione felt that the dam was on the verge of bursting. How could she sit there, calling her 'Ms Granger' in that emotionless tone, when not that long ago she'd been moaning her first name in eustacy? But as soon as that thought rose in her, she buried it again. It was to painful, and she was not about to cry. Not here, not now. She couldn't speak. A few times she opened her moth to say something, but nothing came. "I do not know exactly what happened today." McGonagall continued as her pupil didn't react. She didn't know where she was going with this. How could she explain her behaviour, how could she ask Hermione to understand when she herself was so utterly disgusted with what she had done? But she had to finish this. She had to let Hermione go, and the only way was to make the young woman detest her as much as she detested herself at this moment. "I lost it. I flung my own student into a wall." She was rambling. She never rambled! 'Get a hold of yourself Minerva!'  
"Ms Granger, we cannot pursue this, you understand? It isn't right. I'm your professor, though I shouldn't be after what I did today." McGonagall added the last part quietly, but Hermione only heard the first words. She rose to her feet so fast that the chair she'd been sitting on was flung to the floor. Her eyes where burning as the tears started to well up, and she no longer cared if McGonagall saw them. Her face was white as her knuckles on her clunged fists and she clinched her teeth so hard it was a wonder they didn't break. Minerva just looked at her, not able to hide the pain in her eyes, but Hermione took no notice.  
"Fine." Hermione hissed, before everything broke. She glared at the woman she loved so badly with tears streaming down her face. "Don't worry _professor_," She emphasised the last word strongly. "I will not tell anyone that you sent my ball date to the hospital wing. But don't expect me to just sit here and take it when you crush my heart over and over again because you're scared!" Her voice was so loud and so full of the pain she'd been hiding for so long, that Minerva could do nothing but just stare at her. "If you're dumb enough to question my feelings just because of Lilys lack of taste, then fine!Maybe I'm the fool for ever thinking you could actually love!" With that, she burst out of the office, leaving Minerva McGonagall feeling worse than she'd ever thought possible.

Hermione had run just far enough so that she wouldn't be heard from the office she just left. Her legs folded beneath her and she let it all out. For what seemed like an eternity she just laid there, crying her heart out.

So much had happened this day that Neville was quite surprised at the fact that it was merely mid afternoon. His mind had one focus, and one focus only. Not that long ago, he'd been in the arms of the man he loved. He had found a side of Severus that no other man in this school had ever seen. He wasn't sweet and kind, like Neville. In fact, they would always be complete opposites. But there had been love and caring. Besides, Neville had fallen for the brute of a man that was Severus Snape.  
But as he laid there, he wondered... Severus hadn't visited him. In fact, he had left without a word as soon as Madame Pomfrey had taken him. Had this just been a one time thing?  
No. Neville didn't doubt the love in his potion masters eyes. Still...

Neville had no more time to reflect on the subject as Hermione Granger walked in.  
Her steps where determined, and though she tried to hide it, Neville could see she'd been crying. But he was given no chance to ask.  
"Hi Neville." She said in a cheery voice. "How are you feeling?"  
"Great." He smiled at her.  
"You're sure?" She gave him a sceptical look.  
"Sure, I'm feeling better than ever. Even Madame Pomfry hasn't been able to object."  
"Good" She smirked at him and he smiled back, knowing exactly what she was thinking. He nodded as a sign that he was in.  
"Come on then." She said warmly. "We've got a ball to get to, and we both need some serious freshening up."  
Neville grinned at her as he jumped out of his hospital bed and threw on his robes.

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The ball along with Hermiones and Nevilles big Plan will be revealed in the next chapter;-)  
-Jellicos evil smirk-

All my love to you, my wonderful readers who keep me going!  
-Jellicos


	9. The Autumn Ball

Well, it's time for the ball, but things do not work out as planned... Do they ever?  
**Thank you all** for your wonderful reviews! What would I ever do without you:)  
So, read, review and enjoy:)

All my best to you!

Jellicos

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Chapter nine: The Autumn Ball

Hermione Granger was sitting on the windowsill in her dormitory. It was the night of the autumn ball and her dorm mates had already gone down to the great hall. She, on the other hand, was in no particular hurry. She was dressed and ready, but her mind was elsewhere.  
She'd decided to go through with the plan for Neville's sake. He'd been worried about her but grateful for her loyalty.  
Hermione herself felt horrible. She repressed the guilt over the harsh words she'd spoken to Minerva with the thought that she had deserved it. But had she really?  
Had McGonagall ever really led her to believe that there was any love from her side?  
Hermione sighed. Maybe it was just loneliness. Maybe she'd just reminded Minerva of Lily and that had clouded her judgement. She didn't know.  
But why had she reacted so strongly when she'd seen her with Neville?  
She'd cursed him! Minerva McGonagall had actually thrown one of her own students into a wall in blind rage. She'd seen it herself, she just hadn't reflected on it before now. She hadn't been able to.  
Could it have been..? No.  
Hermione shook her head at the thought.  
"Hermione?" A soft voice behind her made her jump and turn around.  
"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to startle you." Ginny Weasly smiled carefully at her. Hermione smiled back.  
"It's alright Ginny. I just didn't know anyone was in here." She looked at the red-haired beauty before her. "You look fantastic." She said. "Why aren't you at the ball?"  
"We're on our way, but Harry needs to talk to you." Ginny looked at her with some concern.  
"But why doesn't he-" She stopped and blushed slightly." Oh, right, the stairs turn into a slide." She giggled a little at the memory of Ron and Harry furiously telling her about how the stairs to the girls dormitory always turned into a slippery slide as soon as a boy stepped foot on them.  
Ginny grinned at her.  
"He's waiting in his own dormitory for you." She started walking back out the door and Hermione decided to follow her. "By the way..." Ginny turned to face her as she opened the door. "You look amazing."

Ginny had followed Hermione to the boys' dormitory where Harry alone, was pacing back and forth. This really wasn't his area and he had no idea what to say. He just knew he had to say something. He couldn't bear seeing his friend in such agony any longer, and he was extremely grateful that Ginny had agreed to help him.  
"Harry, you look great." Hermione eyed her friend who'd stopped in mid pace and suddenly looked very uncomfortable. For a moment he just stared at her. And it was Ginny who broke the silence.  
"Yes Harry, she looks amazing. Now tell her why you wanted to talk to her." She smirked at them both, knowing that it was probably a big deal for Hermione to be recognised for her beauty, especially by her best friends.  
"Uh, right." Harry fumbled and sat down on his bed, gesturing for Hermione to sit next to him. Okay, he had to do this, and he had to do it now. And Hermione really did look incredible.  
Ginny sat down on Neville's empty bed right next to them, but with a slight distance. She was only there as support. "Hermione, I need to tell you something and I need you to promise that you will not interrupt until I'm finished. I'm not very good at this stuff you know." He'd said it all so fast and without taking a single breath. He looked pale and Hermione was getting worried.  
"What stuff? What's going on?" She asked, slightly alarmed, looking from Harry to Ginny and back.  
"Just promise me." Harry persisted.  
"Okay, I promise." If there was one thing she still knew it was that no matter what she could always trust Harry.  
"I know what happened today, and I know why." Harry blurted out and Hermione looked as if she'd been struck over the head.  
"How? Wha-" She started but Harry cut her off.  
"Hermione, you promised." He pleaded, as this conversation seemed to pain him just as much. So Hermione just nodded and waited for him to go on.  
"Look, you if anyone know that you women confuse me, and love confuses me even more, so I won't pretend like I know what's going on between you and McGonagall." Hermione's jaw dropped. She threw a horrified glance at Ginny, terrified of what this news might make her friends think of her, but Ginny just smiled warmly at her. There was nothing but care and devotion in her eyes, and when she looked back at Harry, she saw the same emotions reflecting in his eyes.  
"I will say this though." He braced himself. "I'd have to be blind not to know that you love her. I know I don't have the best record seeing it took me all these years to finally admit how I feel about Ginny," He blushed a little. "But this is different."  
"It _is_ different Harry, because Ginny loves you too." Hermione's voice was so filled with pain that Harry just looked at her in panic. Ginny on the other hand had knelt down beside Hermione and now took her hand.  
"Hermione, you can't tell me that you don't know how she feels about you? By Merlin, you're the cleverest student in this school!" Ginny looked at her in astonishment.  
"She never cared." Hermione whispered. "She just confused me with- uh, with someone else." Neither of her friends realised she's been on the verge of saying Harry's mothers' name, but stopped herself in time. "Just a few hours ago she told me to leave her alone." Harry and Ginny exchanged a look and Ginny had to lift Hermione's head up to get her to face her.  
"Well, after what she did to Neville she probably felt a bit guilty." Ginny smiled slightly.  
"You know?" Hermione looked astonished at both Harry and Ginny.  
"Neville told us." Harry said. Hermione's head was spinning. This was just too much.  
"He knows?" Her words where just audible.  
"Yupp, and he could care no less." Ginny said. "After all, it sent him right into the arms of-"  
"Don't say it!" Harry held his hands over his ears.  
"They love each other Harry!" Ginny argued.  
"I know, but I don't have to like it." Harry muttered.  
"Anyway," Ginny turned to Hermione again after giving Harry a look worthy of Mrs Weasly. "What could possibly drive the so together professor McGonagall to do something so harsh?" Ginny looked sternly at Hermione. "Oh, don't you get it?" She seemed almost impatient. "There is only one thing on this earth that makes you do the most absurd and stupid things, things like cursing your students or date losers like Michael." Ginny turned a little red, knowing that she'd just revealed to Harry that she'd dated her first boyfriend to make him jealous. But she couldn't look at him right now as she refused to break eye contact when she noticed that Hermione still didn't believe her. "Christ, if Harry noticed why can't you! Listen to me," Ginny took a deep breath and said in her most calm and forceful voice.  
"Hermione, she's in love with you." And Hermione looked up. Her eyes filled with tears as she met Ginny's reassuring gaze. Hermione tried to say something, but nothing came out.  
"You remember all those times I came for you for advice about Harry?" Ginny ignored her boyfriends' surprised looks and just focused on Hermione who nodded.  
"You didn't really think I was that lost did you?" Ginny smiled at her.  
"Well, I was starting to wonder if you'd lost your mind" Hermione admitted and allowed herself to smirk slightly at Ginny.  
"I was hoping you'd tell me." Ginny sounded a bit hurt.  
"Tell you?" Hermione didn't understand. "Tell you what?"  
"That you would confide in me about McGonagall." Ginny said quietly.  
Hermione just looked at her. Then she understood.  
"Oh, Ginny!" She didn't want her friend to think she didn't trust her! "If I'd known, I probably would have... I just, I didn't realise it until this year and then, well... everything got so complicated..." She trailed off but Ginny looked quite surprised.  
"You didn't realise it until now!" She exchanged a perplexed look with Harry.  
"Well, no... Or maybe I did, I just didn't want to admit it until I had no choice."  
"But..." Ginny refused to believe her. "All those looks, the tension, you had to have known! It's been there between you both for years!" When Hermione looks as if what she'd just said had been in Greek, Ginny lost patience. She rose to her feet and walked back and forth a bit before stopping in front of Hermione and actually pointing her finger at her.  
"Now you listen to me." Ginny's voice was so forceful it would even have made her older twin brothers jump and straighten up in their seats. "The kind of love you two share is something most people will never experience. So you'd better do something about this or I bloody well will! I'm not going to let you throw this away." She turned to Harry. "Let's go. Neville should be back to pick Hermione up any minute now." Harry didn't think twice about obeying, and stood up as if by reflex. You didn't argue with Ginny when she sounded like that.  
"We'll se you downstairs." He said quickly to Hermione before following Ginny.

Just a few minutes later Neville came up.  
"Harry said you might be here." He said, looking at her with even more concern than he'd shown before. "You okay?"  
"Slight change of plans Neville." She said in a monotone voice, not really looking at him. "Sit down for a minute."

The ball was well on the way. The Great Hall had been transformed into a fiery autumn landscape and party-dressed people where dancing wildly to the festive tunes of the ever so popular Twisted Sisters.  
Minerva McGonagall had not had a choice but to attend this night, and even though she'd managed to keep her emotions locked up tightly so that she appeared as calm and graceful as usual, she couldn't keep her mind from playing scene after scene in her head.  
She'd taken a seat at a small table in the far corner of the room far from everyone else.  
Minerva still hadn't seen Hermione or Neville. She didn't know whether to be relieved or worried. She could still hear the last words spoken by her young love; 'If you're dumb enough to question my feelings just because of Lily's lack of taste, then fine! Maybe I'm the fool for ever thinking you could actually love!'  
How did she know about Lily? Why had she not been disgusted at that fact? And why had she said that Lily lacked taste? Question her feelings? Hermione was so young, she probably didn't know what she was thinking or feeling.  
But that didn't lessen the pain of hearing the painfilled voice of hers shouting again and again in Minervas head; 'Maybe I'm the fool for ever thinking you could actually love!'  
How could she say such a thing! But Minerva knew all too well the answer to her own question.  
She hadn't given Hermione a single reason to think that she was capable to the fierce emotions running in her veins at this very moment. And it seemed that Minervas night was just getting worse by the minute.  
As the front doors to the hall opened, there was the most gorgeous woman she'd ever layed eyes on. And yes, she was a woman indeed. There was no hint of the awkward young girl who'd walked into her classroom seven years ago.  
Hermione had spent much time in front of the mirror for this night, and it showed. Her usually bushy, brown hair had been flattened down into soft curls and into an elaborate due on her head, with just a few strains falling down her front, framing her face in soft brown curls. She was wearing make-up too. Not much, but just enough to accentuate her eyes, lips and high cheekbones.  
But it was the dress that made every single person in the room turn and stare.  
The pale purple lowcut dress looked as if it was made in soft webb. It clung to her body as a second skin and did nothing to hide the figure of a fully grown and breathtaking woman.  
But the stares where not only directed at her, though Minerva did not notice the very handsome young man at her arm. Neville Longbottom looked strinking on the arm of his friend. His unruely hair had also been tamed to show the soft blond curles that fell down to his forehead. He was wearing new ball robes, elegantly black and clean with just a hint of purple to match his date. The bright blue eyes shone of warmth and somehow seemed even warmer than usual.  
The couple took their place on the dance floor as people moved to form a path for them to the center of the room. Appearently Hermione had drilled Neville in the art of ballroom dancing since they gave a spectacular preformance and Neville did not miss a single beat.  
"Mind of I join you?" The slight hint of nervousness in Snapes voice made McGonagall jump.  
"Not at all Severus, please sit." She said, looking at him as if expecting a scene.  
"Look..." Snape took a deep breath as if what he was about to say pained him too much. "I'm not going to mention the episode this morning and I suggest you do not either."  
Minerva didn't believe what she just heard and it seemed as if Severus noticed.  
"Let's just say that I don't blame you and that I understand." He gave her a symathetic look but soon regained some of his usual frosty maners. "We'll never speak of this."  
"My lips are sealed." Minerva smiled at him. She knew. As she watched Severus eyes consuming the sight she herself tried to avoid, she knew. Of all people she had found an allie in Severus Snape.  
They didn't speak of it. But they both knew. And they both seemed to die a little with every passing song.

Hermione had slid a glance at Minerva as often as she could. But the woman hadn't looked in her direction once.  
She'd been right, Ginny and Harry had been wrong.  
But Snape was watching every step they took and she was going to follow through for Neville. Snape was hooked, all they needed to do now was to wiel in the bait.  
"Mind if I cut in?" Ginny had appeared at their side as a slow song filled the room.  
"No, not at all." Hermione said quietly and moved aside to give Ginny room to dance with Neville, but instead the red-haired girl took hold of her waist and swung Hermione around the dance floor.  
"How're you holding up 'Mione?" Ginny's eyes where filled with concern and warmth, just as they'd been up in the dormitory.  
"She doesn't even know I'm here." Hermione sighed.  
"Really?" Ginny grinned broadly and took a thigter grip around Hermione and pulled her closer. "Take a look." She said and gracefully turned them both around on the spot so that Hermione's eyes met the tearfilled eyes of Minerva from across the room. A second later, Minerva had turned her head away from her but Hermione had seen enough.

She never thought she'd be spending an evening at Severus side and be grateful for his company. But here it was. They'd spent the evening in nervous silence, just speaking long enough to damn the world for what they both where feeling inside. They both knew that the inner conflict they where dealing with was the same in the head of the person next to them. In silent torture the two professors found company in each other, knowing that the other was just as confused and frustrated as they where.  
Snape stared furusly at the two gryffindor stundets dancing in the middle of the room, while McGonagall did all in her power to avoid doing the same.  
"Minerva..." McGonagall was oulle dout of her thoughts and turned to Snape who was looking out at the dancefloor. He didn't say another word but just gave a slight nodd at the floor. Minerva turned against her better knowledge towards the spot he was staring at. The sight of Hermione and Ginny, dancing slowly with their arms around eachother was too much. Her eyes started to water even though she fought them more fiercely than she'd done that entire evening. Suddenly she met Hermiones eye and the pain was so excrutiating that she could do nothing more than look away. Her heart was breaking so loudly she was sure the entire ballroom would hear.  
She couldn't take it.  
Without a word, she'd risen from the table and fled out the grand doors of the great hall.

McGonagall had almost run into Neville and Harry on her way out, but managed to avoid them by an inch. The two young men just stared after her for a second before rushing over to Hermione and Ginny who'd stopped dancing.  
"She was crying." Harry said in disbelief of his own words.  
"What are you doing standing there?" Neville asked Hermione. "Go after her!"  
"But Neville, the plan-" But he cut her off.  
"I can handle it on my own from this point." He smiled coyly before continuing. "Go, get out of here and tell her!" They where all surprised by the authority and determination that Neville suddenly showed, but Hermione didn't need more.  
"Thank you." She said and kissed Neville on the cheek. "All of you." She said to Harry and Ginny who just smiled at her before she ran out the large oak doors.

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Next step; Push the little button that says "Review" and tell me what you think... please?


	10. Just let it go

A warm **welcome and thanks** to my new **R&R's!**  
And of curse a '**Thank you'** from the bottom of my heart to my loyal reviewers! I crave your thoughts as much as air :)  
As for the last chapters; well, Minerva's rampage sort of put a plug in the plans, but not to worry, there will be more evil schemes to come ;)  
And yes, as _Mr Redfern_ pointed out I was referring to the Weird Sisters, though I don't think anyone would mind the Twisted ones :) About that oven _Redfern_… do you want it opened or closed? A few more notes before we get started (sorry about this);  
To _Death of the Endless_: Please don't kill me… -whimper-  
_punruple_: Thanks for the advice! And all of you; check out this writer's hilarious work! _Tabby Kat:_ I'm honoured! -blushes-  
_fan-rei_; no, no duel. I don't think Minerva could stand much more violence at the moment. But I hope you'll like this twist instead;) Besides, Minerva and Severus are far from through…  
_Sapho's Daughter, RainbowGirl 09, Morgana-Alex, Tessaaan _and all of you wonderful people who keep me supplied with the sweetest air; Thank you!  
So read, enjoy and review! ;)

Love,  
Jellicos

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**Chapter ten: Just let it go.  
**  
She knew where to go and she ran faster than she'd ever done before. And as she stood in front of the solid mahogany doors yet again there was no fear, no doubt, no questions in her mind.

Hermione knew what she wanted and she knew it was right. How to convince Minerva was another issue, but she was not going to take no for an answer, not this time.

She knocked and waited for a response. There was none, so she knocked again, and a third time. There was still no reply. She hadn't really expected one, and drew her wand. It took her a few spells to get the door open and she walked into Minerva's office. Everything was dark. But a flicker of light shone from an open door leading to a small living room. Hermione walked up to the door and saw the most fragile sight of a woman sitting in a chair in front of the fireplace.

"Minerva?" She said softly. Minerva shivered at the sound of her name spoken in that soft, sweet voice. How could that have such an effect on her, just hearing her name in that gentle, loving manner? But Hermione sounded worried as well. No wonder. She must look a terrible mess. Her hair falling down her face and back, her red, puffy eyes…

"You're not supposed to be here." McGonagall's voice was thick from crying.

"I know." Hermione replied softly.

"You should be downstairs at the ball with your friends." She tried to sound as normal as possible but gave it up quickly. There was no point any more.

"Then tell me to leave." Hermione's voice was still as soft, but there was a distinct determination in it now.

"It's not my decision." Minerva felt like she was falling apart.

"Yes it is." Hermione noticed that tears where still streaming downs the older woman's face and she did no effort to hide them anymore.

"I'm a professor. I'm your professor and you..." Minerva trailed off.

"I'm not Lily." Hermione said as if Minerva's relation with Lily Evans was common knowledge. Minerva turned and looked at her as if she'd just dropped a bomb on her head, which she sort of had. "I'm not giving you up without a fight." She continued, but Minerva looked away, into the fire with a deep sigh.

"Oh, Hermione..." Minerva didn't even try to conceal the bitter sadness in her words.

"Don't you get it? I love you Minerva." Hermione tried to remain as calm as ever, but there was so much pain and despair in her voice.

"You don't know what you're saying..." Minerva whispered.

"Don't I?" Hermione walked up to the tall chair Minerva was sitting in.

"Hermione, please... don't..." Her voice was cracking, she couldn't stand this, it was all too painful.

"Tell me you have no feelings for me." Hermione said demandingly. Desperately hoping she wouldn't.

"You know I can't." Minerva answered back, fixing her eyes on the fire instead of the woman standing beside her.

"Then tell me you love me." She begged.

"It's not that simple." Minerva's voice was so thin and her eyes started to well up again. She hated to be seen like this!

"But it is." Hermione whispered so close to her now. "It's just that simple." The heat of Hermione's breath so close to her ear made every vein in Minerva's body shout out for more. But the reality of the situation took control over her body.

"You're so young, you don't know..." Her eyes where still transfixed on the burning fire, not daring to look at the young woman's face, knowing she'd loose the battle within her if she did.

"You're worried about your work?" Hermione asked.

"I couldn't care less about work." Minerva stated coolly. She couldn't really think that was it, could she?

"You're scared." Hermione said, as if she'd finally made the pieces of the puzzle fit. "You're afraid that I'm going to leave you. Like Lily did."

"Don't do this." Minerva's whisper was cut short as the tears started falling down her cheeks. She was crying, really crying for the first time in Hermione's presence. She should have stuck with the work-explanation. This was all too much. Hermione was right and she knew it, but feeling the old wounds open and be covered with the new ones…

"Then listen to me." Hermione leant down to face her while supporting her weight with her hands on the armrests of the chair Minerva was sitting in. "Look at me." And Minerva obeyed reluctantly.

"Do you love me?" Hermione asked softly.

"Hermione..." Minerva pleaded for her to stop this. No more pain… please…

"No." She was not backing down now. She needed to know. She needed her to say it. "Do you love me?"

"You know I do!" Minerva rose in anger and pulled a startled Hermione with her, who backed away a few paces in surprise. "I love you so much it's tearing me apart!" She roared.

"Then stop fighting it and let me love you back." Hermione couldn't bare the pain she saw reflecting in Minerva's eyes. But she was not going to let her walk away from her again. Not this time, not ever again.

"Hermione..." Minerva pleaded again. Her heart was breaking, her will was failing and she knew she could only bare this torture for so long.

But Hermione walked up to her, so close Minerva could feel the heat from her skin. How the hell was she supposed to resist her now?

"I want you Minerva." She whispered in a deep voice, so full of passion that all the walls surrounding Minerva McGonagall seemed to fall in an instant. There was no place to hide anymore.

"You don't know what you're asking..." Minerva looked so very vulnerable and her words could just barely be heard, her voice was so thin.

"I'm asking you to let go of your fears and trust me." Hermione whispered so close to her now that she could feel her breath on her face. "I'm asking you to make love to me Minerva."

As she leaned in, she brushed her lips across Minerva's cheek to her lips, tasting the salty tears that where still clinging to her cheek. And Minerva let go. She could no longer fight what every fibre in her body was aching for. She caught Hermione's lips with her own and pulled her into a passionate kiss.

There was no fear anymore, no walls to hide behind, just this. This moment, this kiss, this woman and their love.

Hermione moaned as she parted her lips and their tongues met, caressing each other as if they had a mind of their own. She let her fingers tangle in Minerva's silky soft, auburn hair and removed the last pins holding it up in what earlier this evening had been a bun on her head.

As she let her hand slide down Minerva's back, the other one found its way to the clasp of her robes. It took her but a second or two before Minerva's dress robes where lying at her ankles and she stood before Hermione in nothing but her black undergarments.

Hermione had reluctantly broken the kiss and could do nothing but gasp at the beauty before her. Minerva looked very self-conscious and Hermione hurried to find her voice again.

"You... You're a Goddess." Hermione gasped and Minerva flushed. 'Thank Merlin for those school robes, or I would never have gotten anything done in class.' Hermione thought to herself and smiled. She needed to feel that body against hers. To feel the warmth of that bare skin under her hands. She allowed herself to survey Minerva's slim and curved body for a moment. Savouring every inch of it in her mind.

Minerva felt her body ache. She couldn't hold back her longing any longer and pulled Hermione closer again, needing the feel of her body against her own. She found the zipper on Hermione's gown. She managed to pull it down with a soft caress, making the gown fall to the floor to reveal Hermione's light purple, lace bra and panties.

It was Minerva's turn to gasp at the sight before her. That soft, milky white flesh. That perfect young body of a very mature eighteen year old woman. For several moments she could do nothing but stare. She was so beautiful, so perfect, and "so utterly gorgeous." Minerva didn't realise she'd spoken the last words out loud, but Hermione's blushing cheeks brought her back. Suddenly she started to feel so ashamed of her own body, marked by the years it had lived and battled. She was no youth anymore. Time had surely taken its toll on her. How could this beautiful young woman want her? She knew Hermione's peers would line up to catch her interest.

Hermione seemed to notice what Minerva was thinking, as she let her fingertips glide down Minerva's arm, ever so softly, barely touching the skin. The sensation sent a shiver of pleasure down Minerva's spine as Hermione took her hand in both of her own, watching it as if it was made of diamonds.

"These hands…" She whispered in such awe that Minerva was taken aback by it. "I used to sit in class, seeing these hands perform the most amazing magic with such grace, and all I could think of was how they would feel on my skin." There was raw desire in her voice as she swiftly undid her bra and placed Minerva's hand on her right breast and gasped at the sensation when those long, magical fingers started their work on her erect nipple. She pulled Minerva fiercely against her, her hand around her professor's waist, feeling the heat of their almost naked bodies melt together. She wanted her. She needed to have her. Now.

"Do you have a bed here somewhere?" Hermione asked with that same raw lust, looking at her with such passion and desire, Minerva lost all thoughts of age difference and with a smile, she took her hand and led her in through a door by the sofa.

The room was not much different than the one they just left. But instead of the sofa, armchairs and tables, there was a large, four poster bed by the fireplace, a dresser and a large bookshelf. Hermione walked up to the bed, pulled the curtains out of the way and laid down. Supporting her weight on her elbows, she placed herself across the width of the bed, facing Minerva who was still standing in the doorway.

"Come to me, my love." Hermione said with lust dripping from her every word. And again Minerva obeyed, drawn by the deep desire she knew coated her face; she laid herself down beside Hermione and resumed the kiss that made the world around them vanish.

Without breaking the kiss, which now seemed more important to Hermione than oxygen, she managed to free Minerva of her bra and turn them both around so that Minerva was now lying on her back underneath her. Her hands kept exploring the curves of the woman which she was now straddling, and as she kissed her way down her neck and jaw line the deep moan escaping Minerva's lips was more than enough encouragement. Not an inch of skin would be left untouched.

She gasped as Minerva's hands found their way down to her panty line. 'No. Not yet.' She thought and started inching her way down Minerva's body, out of reach. There was a disgruntled moan from Minerva and Hermione just smiled. She slid of Minerva's underwear in slow caresses, bringing frustrated sounds from the bed. Her own panties where discarded in the same manor before she started kissing her way up Minerva's body again.

There where no thoughts, no worries. There was just her. Her scent, her flesh, her taste. All of which would be forever etched in Minerva's mind.

She had let it go. She'd opened her heart and soul to this woman and now she could do nothing but feel. Her urges where stronger than she ever thought humanly possible, but her love was stronger yet. Minerva could think of no other thing in the world which mattered to her now besides what Hermione's hands and lips where doing to her body.

The pleasure was almost unbearable. It had been so long since anyone had been allowed touched her, and she could not remember ever being touched like this. With such love and devotion, such desire and patience. Every inch of her body was tingling, every part of her aching for more.

Her hands worked feverishly to satisfy her craving, touching, caressing every part of that vibrant body on top of her. She knew she was panting, she could hear her own moans, but the sound of those proves of pleasure that escaped Hermione's soft lips drove her wild.

Hermione was teasing her. She knew what Minerva wanted; she could se the longing in her deep emerald eyes that grew darker by the second. And for a brief moment she lost her breath.

Those eyes. They where no longer the strict, probing eyes of Professor McGonagall. The eyes that could scare every student to confession. No. These where the deep, passionate and loving eyes of Minerva. The eyes that could bring tears of joy to Hermione's eyes, or make her forget her own name. She could read them as clearly as any book, and knowing that she was the one who'd awoken the deep desire within them left her breathless.

"Oh, Hermione…" The pleading moan escaping her Goddesses lips made Hermione pull her hand just a little closer to the place where she knew Minerva was aching for her. She was teasing, but hearing Minerva moan her name like that was so arousing and could easily have made her fall over the edge herself. As she sucked and licked Minerva's stiff, dark nipples, her hand was running between her inner thighs. With a touch as delicate as silk, Hermione brushed a single finger across Minerva's slid. Her reward was instant.

"Please…" Minerva gasped, using all her might to form the word. "Oh, Hermione… Please…"

Hermione couldn't deny her and as she slid two fingers into the dripping wet folds, Minerva gasped again.

Hermione could feel every vein in her body throb and short-circuit her mind as she reacted to Minerva's excitement. The thought that she was the cause for the rich wetness between Minerva's legs made her dizzy with desire. As her fingers worked inside Minerva, the woman she loved was thrusting, inviting her deeper into her. Her hips rocking, her body squirming, her lips parted and uttering groans of pure ecstasy.

Hermione could do nothing but take in the most gorgeous sight her hazel eyes had ever seen, before she bent down and muffled a moan with a kiss.

Minerva threw her arms around her neck, grabbing her hair as the trusting became harder and faster. Hermione knew she was near the edge now and she wanted to se her lover come.

She broke from the kiss, leaving Minerva to clasp the bedspread as her body started to shake and she went over the edge. With her back arched, she flung her head back as she cried out Hermione's name.

It took several minutes before she'd gained her breath back and she turned to face Hermione who had cradled her though the aftermath of the orgasm and was now lying on her side next to her with a very satisfied grin on her face.

"Don't you look pleased?" Minerva smirked at her when her voice started to work again and pulled her in for a kiss.

"I never imagined there could be such beauty." Hermione said earnestly, the love in her voice still filled with deep lust. It took Minerva a while before her mind had registered the words and as it hit her, her body flushed. She'd noticed the need in Hermione's eyes and she was desperate to show her just how much she craved her.

Hermione let out a surprised gasp as Minerva flung her over on her back and moved to hover over her. There was a mischievous grin on her face as she started to kiss her way down Hermione's body. Minerva could feel herself regaining every inch of that raw desire as Hermione reacted to her every move. She could feel the young woman thrust up against her touch and she had to back herself away from that edge as Hermione moaned her name.

"Oh, Minerva… don't stop…" Her breathing was becoming shallow and uneven as Minerva's lips moved closer to her throbbing centre.

Minerva didn't take her eyes of her as she moved to the bushy folds between Hermione's legs. She wanted to se her, se her pleasure and longing.

As she flicked her tongue against her lovers opening she could not hold back a smile as Hermione trust into her mouth and arched her back.

"Oh god… Minerva, please…!" Her husky voice was so filled with yearning that Minerva could not bare to tease her any longer. Hermione was already so close to the edge, it took but a few flickers of Minerva's tongue to send her into a frenzy of pleasure. Her head was tossed to the side as she trust and came in Minerva's mouth, screaming her name in orgasmic ecstasy.

As Minerva lay down beside her as closely as she could, Hermione opened her eyes and smiled.  
"I do love you, you know." Hermione said, still a bit light-headed.

"I love you too 'Mione." Hermione shivered at the sound of her pet-name from Minerva's lips. "And you where right…" Minerva continued. "It's the most beautiful sight."

Minerva stroked her cheek before spooning her and laying her arm around Hermione in a slightly protective gesture which made the younger woman giggle.

But Minerva was too close to sleep to even respond to it.

Hermione wondered briefly if her professor would wake up with horrible regret the next morning, but her fears where laid to rest as Minerva snuggled her face into her hair and neck.

"Don't ever leave me 'Mione." She said in a sleepy voice, as if half asleep already.

"I swear." Hermione whispered, turning to face her and managed to se a quick smile on Minerva's lips.

"Good… then I won't have to tie you to the bed." Minerva mused. "Or…"

"Go to sleep Min." Hermione said in a pretended strict voice. And she felt Minerva pull her closer still in response to the nickname. "No power on this earth could keep me from your side." She added.

"I'll hold you to that." Minerva replied and they shared one last kiss before their bodies finally gave up the struggle against sleep.

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Well, I will say this; the ball continued without them, and you might just find out what happened there in the next chapter.  
Now… see the little cute little blue button there? Isn't it pretty? Go on, press the pretty blue button! Come on… come one… press the pretty button! Pretty please? Make my day?

Love,

Jellicos


	11. Inside the bubble

I'm sorry for the late update and the short, pretty lame chapter. You'd be amazed at what several hours of intense conference sessions can do to a person. Anyway, here isa short glimpse at the ball.  
Dedicated to **Redfern** and **Death of the Endless** who will both seriously consider murder when I tell everyone that I will _not_ be writing a NL/SS sex-scene. (If you're interested in that, look up the work of the previously mentioned authors.)  
To quickly answer a few questions: NO! I would never leave my favourite couple just like that. Not after their first night together. You'll see much more of Minerva and Hermione:) They still have a way to go...  
And yes, I'm going to write more stories:) I'm currently working on a few. More MM/HG-stories will come, and a few CSI-stories if anyone is interested.  
And thank you so much for all your amazing reviews!  
Your words are my oxygen!

All my love to you!  
Jellicos

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**Chapter eleven: Inside the bubble**

Had he expected anything else? At least he seemed to be one of the few who noticed Minerva's quick departure from the hall. He'd seen the tears on her face and he knew where they came from.

Albus hadn't underestimated the young Ms Granger. She'd followed Minerva, leaving him free to supervise the ball. This was getting out of hand. And worse yet, his deputy headmistress and her star pupil weren't the only ones acting strange this night.

Albus had noticed Severus odd behaviour for a while, and tonight it was painfully clear to him what was causing it.

This was all giving him a headache. He needed a drink.

"I hope she'll be alright…" Harry looked at the door where first McGonagall, then Hermione had vanished.

"Don't worry Harry." Neville had a sly smile on his face.

"What about you Nev?" Ginny asked him. Neville looked very nervous now and threw a worried glance at Harry.

Harry took the hint.

"Look, mate." He sighed. "You know I don't like this and I can't for the life of me understand it." When Neville looked as if he was about to burst into tears, Harry decided to hurry up with the rest of his thoughts. "But…" This was going to take all of his will-power. "If this is what you want, if you really love him…" He tried so hard not to let his feelings of disgust for Snape show. "…then I'll help you."

He was almost thrown off his feet as Neville threw himself around his neck to hug him.

"Thank you Harry!"

Harry met Ginny's approving gaze and patted Neville on the back.

"Alright mate no need to get your boyfriend all jealous." He said, trying to sound as normal as possible.

"What are you going to do?" Ginny asked as Neville let go of Harry. A smirk spread across his face.

"Hermione didn't want to go through with the plan, but she made sure I would be able to." He grinned at the two confused Gryffindors at his sides.

"Just tell us what you need us to do." Ginny said, as if deciding it was no use in asking.

"At this point all I need is to get Severus to take my hand. Hermione has already seen to everything else." Neville smiled.

"Okay, I'm going to ask." Harry said, his curiosity not being able to stand much more. "What happens when Snape takes your hand?"

Neville leaned closer to them. They where already far from the rest of the crowd, but he wanted to be absolutely sure that nobody heard what he was about to say.

"Hermione cast a spell on my glove." Neville beamed as she showed them the silky white glove on his right hand. Both Ginny and Harry looked at it and seemed to turn slightly paler. "Don't worry." Neville smiled as he noticed. "The spell is designed for Severus; to everyone else it's just an ordinary glove."

"Alright, so how do we get Snape to hold your hand?" Harry asked, still quite uncomfortable but determined to help.

"Oh, I don't think that will be a big problem." Ginny said in a teasing voice, jerking her head slightly in Snape's direction. And true enough, their potions master was observing their every move from across the room. "Come Neville, let's dance!" She continued and took Neville's hand. "Harry, wait a while, then try to cut in." She noticed that her boyfriend wasn't too happy with her plan, but she knew he'd do it for Neville. So Ginny whispered a quiet 'I love you' to Harry, before dragging Neville out on the dance floor.

Severus never thought he'd actually feel for the dull professor McGonagall. Yet he hadn't been able to repress a slight sense of understanding as he'd seen her run out of the hall with tears escaping her eyes. Suddenly he missed the company. It was absurd, it really was. They had been civil at most, and only due to the fact that they where colleagues. As heads of rival houses they couldn't be more different. Yet he knew that they shared the same burden.

Now he was alone, gazing over the dance floor where his eyes where firmly planted on Neville. He was dancing with that Weasly-girl. Severus noted his eyes narrowing and his heart-rate increasing. What was that boy playing at? Neville should know by now that he belonged to Severus. Making a scene with that idiot girl could prove very hazardous to his health. Snape was fuming.

But as he saw Potter walking up to the dancing couple he saw his chance.

Potter was bound to make a scene, and that would not be appropriate at a school ball. As a Professor, Severus would have no choice but to divert such an incident. He smirked. Who would have imagined that Potter would actually do something useful for once.

Harry had done as he'd been told and was now having a pretend argument with Ginny and Neville. He didn't like this at all, but he had promised to help Neville and he was not about to break his word. Though the voice behind him, dripping of venom was almost enough to change his mind.

"Potter," Snape spat the name out as if it had caused a very bad taste on his tongue. "I suggest you take your little lovers-quarrel some place more suitable. The bathroom perhaps..."

Harry had to bite his tongue not to say anything harsh. But he couldn't for the life of him see what Neville saw in this horrible excuse for a human being.

"Sorry Professor." Neville said, knowing Harry's temper was not to mess with. "Harry and I where just leaving." To his satisfaction, Neville noticed that his words reached their goal. Snape looked confused for a moment, but as Neville took Harry's arm and tried to walk past Snape, Neville got the desired reaction.

"Not so fast Longbottom." Snape put his hand on the curly haired boys chest to stop him from moving.

This was all Neville needed. With instant reflexes that no one would have expected him to possess, he'd let go of Harry's arm and taken Snape's hand in his own.

Instinctively Harry and Ginny backed away as a large bubble formed around the two men. By this time, the entire ball room had noticed the strange phenomenon and gasps where heard all over the room as students and teachers alike pulled back to watch.

"Longbottom, what is the meaning of this?" Neville was pleasantly surprised to find that Snape's voice was not accusative, but rather impressed if yet demanding.

"It's a spell." Neville answered without thinking.

"Yes, I can see that." Snape replied irritably. "I was referring to the fact that I seem to be trapped in a bubble with you." Even Snape could see the humour in his statement. But it was not in his nature to acknowledge such things.

"Well, you see Severus..." Neville decided to be bold. He had nothing to loose at this point, and Snape couldn't very well kill him in plain sight of half the school. His boldness earned him a raised eyebrow from his professor. But Snape allowed him to continue. "The spell is designed to hold us both within this bubble until we both confess our true feelings towards each other aloud." Neville was blushing heavily, but he didn't break eye-contact. He could see Snape's expression change from fury, to something Neville had not expected at all; amusement.

"I expect this is the work of Ms Granger?" Even the tone in Snape's voice hinted of amusement.

"It is." Neville replied. "But she chose a different strategy tonight."

"Yes, I noticed that as well." Snape mused, allowing himself to reflect on the situation for a moment before returning to reality. "So, Neville..." Snape smirked as he saw the boy shivering slightly at the sound of his first name. "the task at hand would be to reveal our true feelings for each other in order to get out of this bubble?"

Neville nodded. His boldness had sunken into his shoes as Snape surveyed him up and down.

"Very well Longbottom. Go on then." Neville looked up in panic. A very satisfied and content Severus Snape was watching him, waiting for him to reveal his feelings for him out loud with half the school listening. Maybe he hadn't thought this through properly.

But it was too late now. If he was going to do this, he might as well do it right.

Neville took a deep breath before fixing his gaze upon his potions master.

"I'm in love with you Severus." Neville was surprised at how strong his voice was, but he had no time to reflect, he had to get this all out as soon as possible, before he lost his nerve. "You're crude, rude and sometimes you're actually mean. And I want you. Badly. Not just for a night. I want to belong to you." The world outside of the bubble had disappeared and all he knew was that the man of his dreams was watching him in utter surprise. Neville didn't know if it was because of what he'd said or because he'd actually said it. Either way he was embarrassed beyond words.

Snape didn't move and Neville was getting nervous. He had to set things right. He wondered briefly if there was any way that he could take back the words he'd just spoken, but his thoughts where cut short as Snape's free hand grabbed the hair on the back of his head and pulled him in for a rough kiss. None of them heard the gasps and whispers of the people around them. They where both lost in the sensations of their own pleasure.

Neville threw his own free hand around Snape's waist, pulling him closer. He gave in to the older man's request to enter his mouth without hesitation and a moan escaped his lips as Snape's tongue violently searched for his own.

Without warning, Snape pulled away, still clenching his fingers in Neville's hair.

"You _are_ mine." He said. His voice husky and raw, but there was no mistaking the love and care that surged though it. "I'm in love with you too, Merlin knows why, but I want you and you're not getting away this time." Neville smiled.

"Shall we then?" The younger man asked, gesturing to the doors. Snape noticed that the bubble around them had vanished and grinned. He pulled Neville close and whispered to him;

"Are you ready to be claimed?" Neville blushed but grinned back.

"Lead the way, my love." He answered. For a moment Snape didn't move. It seemed as the last two words had nailed him to the floor and he looked at Neville in disbelief. But as Neville squeezed his hand gently, Snape regained his trademark expression and almost dragged Neville with him out the doors, his robes swaying behind him as always.

As the large oak doors closed behind the two men, the room erupted in loud voices.

Ginny was fast on her feet, hurrying up to the band to get the music started again before grabbing Harry's hand and forcing him onto the dance floor. Within a few minutes the scene looked like nothing had been disturbed as couples flooded the dance floor to the popular music.

Albus Dumbledore was at his wits end. As he looked over the cheery dance floor from his seat he couldn't help feeling defeated. First Minerva and now Severus. Maybe he had been to quick to turn down the job at the ministry. Battle evil and facing death he could do, but in the light of blind love he was lost. He wasn't paid nearly enough to handle all this.

A glance around the room would have told him that he was not the only member of the staff with these thoughts. But Dumbledore was content in making up his own mind. The ball was almost over and he was going to enjoy the rest of it. After that he could worry about his love-sick staff members.

As Dumbledore let his gaze wander across the room, his eyes twinkled in that characteristic way; a sign that nothing was really worth worrying over.

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Come on... you know what to do... it's right there, in the left corner of your screen. Go on... press the pretty blue button! Just a few words to help me breath:)


	12. The morning after

Thank you all so much! Your words are my oxygen and inspire me to keep writing.  
There are just a few more chapters to this story left, but I'm not done with Minerva and Hermione just yet ;-) More stories to come for those who want them!  
So, this is the morning after. When Hogwarts awakes after a very odd autumn ball.  
Enjoy my darlings! And please, _please_, review!

Love,  
Jellicos  
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**Chapter twelve: The morning after**

She didn't know what had awoken her, and in the middle between dream and reality she really didn't care. She'd had the most amazing dream, so vivid, so enticing. She was almost sad to let it go.

But as the persistent light of dawn beckoned her insistently and reluctantly she decided to let go of her dreamy state to welcome the morning that refused to leave her alone on an early Sunday. She felt so warm, so safe.

Wait. Sunday? Minerva opened her eyes and the events of the previous night came flooding back to her as she saw the bushy brown hair that laid spread across her chest.

Oh, dear. She'd really messed things up now. She looked down to find Hermione's body spread across hers, her arms around her waist, her leg entwined with her own and her head resting on her chest. Minerva's own hands had a firm and protective grip around the young woman, holding her tight against her.

What had she done? She'd gone to bed with her student. She'd revealed the deep feelings she had for her young protégé and then she'd taken advantage of her.

And now she would leave. Hermione would leave and take the pieces of Minerva's shattered heart with her. Just like Lily, Hermione would decide this was too complicated, that it had just been lust, nothing else, and she'd leave. She'd run to the Weasly boy or Longbottom and she'd never look back.

Damn it! She'd promised herself never to do this again. And here she was, about to get her heart broken yet again. And this time Minerva was sure she would die for it.

Never had she felt so strongly for anyone in her life. Never had she known these feelings even possible. And now they would consume her, tear her apart and kill her.

She had to get out of here.

Carefully, as not to awake the beauty lying on top of her, she started squirming out of her grip.

"Good morning love. I was wondering when you'd wake up." Hermione lifted her head to look at the woman who'd held her so tightly through the night only to find her looking back at her with fear and panic in her emerald eyes. "What's wrong?" She asked and Minerva averted her gaze. In a feeble attempt, Minerva sat up and tried to rush out of the bed. But Hermione was too fast.

She should have known that Minerva would have feelings of guilt and fear as she awoke. She'd just hoped that her actions and words the night before had finally convinced her older lover that she was serious. But now it seemed that the older woman needed to be reminded again.

Hermione had grabbed Minerva's wrist and gently pulled her back into the bed.

"Look at me." Hermione pleaded. But Minerva refused to meet her eyes. Hermione wondered briefly how anyone could have hurt this amazing woman this bad, and the thought made her sick.

"Minerva, look at me." It was an order and Minerva reluctantly obeyed. She wasn't sure if she could believe her eyes. Maybe they too where playing a trick on her. The love and devotion she saw in the deep hazel eyes' looking back at her was enough to make her speechless.

Hermione saw the fear, the guilt and the searing pain reflecting in Minerva's face. The strong feelings almost clouding the deep love that arose as their gaze locked.

"Do you remember what you asked me before we fell asleep last night?" Hermione asked her, not letting go of her wrist, both women sitting up in the bed, the bed linen only covering the lover parts of their naked bodies.

Minerva couldn't speak. Her throat was thick as the tears started to burn behind her eyes. She turned away from the brunette. She couldn't bear to face her but she nodded.

"No power on this earth could keep me from your side." Hermione repeated the words she'd spoken a few hours ago. "I meant every word. I meant everything I said to you last night. I love you Minerva McGonagall, and there is nothing in this world that could ever change that. There's nothing on this earth that would make me leave you. Ever." Her voice was strong and sincere and it seemed to have the desired effect. As Minerva turned to face her, there where tears in her eyes. There was uncertainty, but the fear, the guilt and the pain was gone.

"I love you." It was no more than a whisper, but it made Hermione's heart jump none the less.

"I love you too Min." She replied with a warm smile, kissing away the single tear that had fallen down Minerva's cheek.

"What do we do now?" Minerva asked.

"I don't know about you, but I have no desire to get up this early on a Sunday." Hermione grinned and Minerva couldn't help but laugh. "We'll work out a plan later; right now I just want to enjoy the privilege of having Professor Minerva McGonagall in bed, naked."

With that, she pushed the raven-haired woman gently onto the bed and caught her lips with her own in a passionate kiss.

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He didn't remember when he'd last woken up with such a headache. Sitting up in his bed, Albus Dumbledore started rubbing his temples in a fruitless attempt to relieve the throbbing in his head. As the events of the night before came rushing into his mind he groaned. This wasn't happening.

But it was. It had. At least Minerva had been somewhat discreet about it. Severus on the other hand had caused such a scene that Albus for a second had contemplated a mass obliviation of the students' memories of the evening.

Well, he figured there was only one thing to do at this moment; breakfast. During which he could estimate the damage from the night before.

As the headmaster of Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry got up and got dressed there where mutters from under his breath, involving such words as 'childish', 'lovesick' and the name of Severus was muttered a few times along with Minerva's.

On his way out he popped a sherbet lemon into his mouth. His favourite candy did lighten his mood a bit, and restored the twinkle in his eyes.

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It took him a while to realise that it was real. That he had in fact awoken in the strong arms of his potions master. He felt a smirk curl his lips as he watched the naked arms of Severus Snape holding him protectively against his own body. He wondered for a moment where his new lovers' bathroom was. There hadn't exactly been much time for a tour of the place as Severus had dragged him from the ball and into his privet quarters.

He searched the room with his gaze; Severus must have a lavatory in here somewhere. But as he started to wiggle out of his lovers grip in order to try to locate a bathroom, there was a hoarse whisper in his ear;

"Going somewhere Longbottom?" Neville shivered at the sultry, warm voice that was so close, he could feel every syllable bounce of the flesh of his neck.

"I'm just going in search of your bathroom professor." He turned to face Severus and couldn't help but smile at what he saw. The newly awake professor Snape with his raven hair on end, a satisfied smirk on his face made him look as a predator that'd just had the best meal of his life.

"Without asking permission? Now really Longbottom, is that any way for a Gryffindor to behave?" Severus was teasing him. There was nothing harsh in his tone, just possessiveness and lust.

Neville was about to say that he thought Severus had been asleep, but thought better of it.

"Oh, I think I crossed that line when I shagged the head of Slytherin house." He teased back. At this, Severus expression changed. His face became much more serious and he arched one eyebrow.

"So now you think you can just walk around my quarters as you please?" Snape surveyed the young man by his side, but Neville knew this man much too well by now to let himself be intimidated by him. Yet, he had no desire to stop playing.

"I'm sorry my love." He said, suppressing the smile that was trying to overcome his lips as he saw Severus reaction to the words; 'my love.' "Do I have permission to use your bathroom?"

Severus seemed to gather himself quite fast. The tender words spoken to him from the lips of this young man that he'd tortured for almost seven years now had stunned him. Severus knew many things, but true love had never been one of them. Yet there he was, this beautiful, golden-haired boy, lying by his side and uttering terms of endearment. He was not about to let him leave his bed.

With a hungry smirk, Severus flung himself over Neville, hovering only inches over the young man body.  
"So you want to go to the bathroom Longbottom?" He whispered in a husky, raw voice, holding his lips purposely just beyond reach for Neville to catch them with his own. "Are you quite sure about that?" He knew he had the young Gryffindor right where he wanted him. "What do you want Neville?" He asked, every word coated in raw lust. But before Neville had a chance to reply, Severus had crushed his lips to his and Neville forgot everything else.

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Next; it's breakfast-time :)  
So, use that little _lavender_ button on your left and feed me my oxygen :)


	13. Breakfast

I do apologise for the delay. But I'm blaming it all on the most wonderful distraction of the sweetest girl. She is also the reason that I haven't given up on this story or having this sweet romance end in utter disaster. Of cure all my AMAZING readers and reviewers have a **lot** of credit for that too, you rock!  
Still, writing about great love is so much easier when you have the best inspiration in the world. I love you Angelique…. And you'd better start reading Harry Potter:)  
So, much more to come my darlings, I will do better in updating from now on. I've kind been stuck writing CSI fanfics :P  
Enjoy!

Love,  
Jellicos

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**Chapter thirteen: Breakfast**

As he reached the great hall for breakfast, Albus Dumbledore was surprised at how calm it was.

Sure there where whispers, laughter and talking amongst the students. But that was nothing out of the ordinary.

Both Severus and Minerva where sitting in their usual seats and talking to their colleagues. Nothing seemed different. It took him a few moments to register the very high collar on Minerva's robes. She however ignored his questioning gaze and it seemed like she had made it quite clear to everyone that this was not up for discussion.

Quite content, Albus sat down in his chair beside his headmistress and looked over the crowd of chattering students. Only now did he realize that the Gryffindor table was unusually empty. Neither Ms Granger nor Mr Longbottom where in sight. He noticed a few other unclaimed seats and realised that there must be at least two other Gryffindors missing from breakfast this day.

He looked over at his professors, but neither Minerva nor Severus showed the slightest hint that they knew anything about the whereabouts of their students.

Albus sighed. This was going to be a very long week indeed.

Minerva had indeed no knowledge of Hermione's whereabouts during breakfast.

They had agreed not to go down together. Hermione would have to go back to her dormitory and the two of them where to meet at noon to talk.

But With Albus by her side, Minerva was not about to venture the task of letting her gaze wander for her lover. Instead she turned to her old friend with a smile.

"Good morning Albus." She said, realising to her own irritation that she was already sounding like a school girl in love.

"Good morning Minerva." Albus replied with a smile. His eyes darted towards the collar of her robes. "New addition to your wardrobe?" He asked and as Minerva's expression threatened to turn her cheery mood into complete silence he quickly added. "I like it." With an approving glance. "Very fashionable."

"Thank you Albus." There was more emotion in those words than from a mere compliment and they both understood each other. Albus had conveyed his approval for their relationship as long as he did not notice. And Minerva knew it.

Then there was the matter of Severus Snape. Suddenly Albus felt extremely tired.

He cared deeply for his friend and colleague, but the thought of addressing the issue of young Mr Longbottom was one he dreaded.

And Severus showed no sign as to be interested in acknowledging the events of the night before as he alternated between small talk with professor Flitwick and starring out at the crowd of students.

Well, a good breakfast would be in order. Albus Dumbledore reasoned as he sighed before helping himself to the scrambled eggs.

Hermione Granger had managed to sneak into the dormitory undetected. Almost everyone was already down for breakfast and she had changed clothes in a hurry.

It wasn't until she was crossing the common room on her way to the great hall that she even noticed anyone of her house mates.

"Late night Hermione?" A soft voice asked from behind one of the red armchairs.

"Ginny! You scared me!" Hermione turned to see her friend grinning at her from across the room. "Why aren't you eating breakfast?"

"Why?" Ginny's grin broadened as she leaned back into the chair. "Because my best friend left the ball and didn't come back until oh..." She paused to check the time. "About ten minutes ago."

Hermione blushed. She'd been caught. With a sigh she lunged down in the chair opposite Ginny and watched her friend.

"What happened after I left?" She asked, hoping to delay the interrogation a while longer.

"Oh, you missed quite a show." Ginny said and started to inform her of the spectacle Neville and Snape had made at the ball. Hermione's eyes grew wider with every sentence the redhead spoke.

"Oh dear… I guess that spell may have been a little too effective." She stated after Ginny had retold the events.

"Well, enough stalling 'Mione." Ginny smirked. "Still a virgin?"

"Ginny!" Hermione squeaked, shocked at her friends boldness.

"Well, I had to ask." Ginny said with a shrug. "So?"

Hermione didn't answer but her blushing cheeks and averted gaze was enough to send the youngest Weasly into a giddy frenzy.

"I knew it!" She exclaimed delighted.

"Sssh! Keep your voice down Gin!" Hermione gestured and looked around in panic.

"There is no one in here." Ginny looked at her as if offended. "You think I didn't check?"

"Sorry." Hermione mumbled, knowing full well that her friend would never put her in that position. But Ginny just smiled.

"Now tell me!" She said, getting comfortable in her chair and looking at the blushing Hermione demanding the entire story.

It seemed different somehow, standing outside these familiar mahogany doors. She wasn't sure if it where the doors themselves or her that was different. But in all logic it must be her.

It was noon when Hermione found herself knocking on Minerva McGonagall's office door. She was surprised when she didn't hear the familiar voice ring through them to tell her to enter. But a second later she was greeted by a smiling Minerva opening the doors for her.

"Come in Hermione." She said and Hermione stepped inside the office doors. "Can I get you some t-" Minerva's offer was cut mid sentence by lips pressing against her own, Unable to make any resistance to the desire burning within her, Minerva wrapped her arms around her young lover and pulled her closer. As Hermione laced her fingers over her neck to pull her deeper, a moan escaped Minerva and she lost all thought of what they where supposed to be doing.

Reluctantly Hermione pulled away again. Her deep desire for the woman in front of her had gotten the better of her and those lips had just pulled her in like a magnet. Light-headed and drunk on her lovers taste, she knew she owed Minerva more, so she had broken the tender kiss when oxygen had become an issue.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself." She whispered, still holding the raven-haired beauty close. "It has been three hours since I kissed you last." She smiled at her own excuse, but she wasn't prepared for the sadness that suddenly filled the emerald eyes in front of her.

"Minerva?" Hermione watched her anxiously but the older woman averted her gaze and tuned away from her.

"We need to talk…" The tone in Minerva's voice forcefully crushed Hermione to the floor. Those words where never good.

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Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeevil cliffie:)


	14. Decisions and discoveries

A big thank-you to **Sapho's Daughter** for helping me out in my rot! I credit her for the ideas you'll read in this chapter and to a bigger extent for helping me find my way back to this fic.  
The credit for keeping me writing also goes out to my devoted and amazing readers! You rock! Without you I would have given up on this story ages ago. Thank you all for your fantastic reviews and support!

With love,  
Jellicos

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**Chapter fourteen: Decisions and discoveries. **

_"We need to talk…" The tone in Minerva's voice forcefully crushed Hermione to the floor. Those words where never good._

Hermione swallowed hard. The tears where not far away. She knew all too well what those four words spelled… disaster, heartbreak, doom.

She turned away, there was no way she'd be able to face Minerva as the woman ripped her heart out.

Every moment of the night before was played before her eyes as she braced herself for the impact, reminding herself to keep breathing.

"I need you to listen to what I have to say before interrupting." Minerva's voice was pleading which caught Hermione off guard. But all she could do was nod.

"This is very hard for me to say, but I've thought about it and I think it's for the best. You are only eighteen; Merlin knows it's been a very long time since I was that age." Sadness filled her voice, but Hermione let her continue. She still couldn't bring herself to look at the woman she loved so desperately.

"I don't regret what happened last night, I've wanted it for so long and for the first time in my life I felt truly alive. If you knew what you do to me, what feelings you have awoken in my old heart. I never thought I was capable of feeling this way…" The last part was but a whisper as tears threatened to cloud Minerva's eyes.

"Minerva..." Hermione tried, her pleading tone more than the older witch could stand.

"Please… just let me say this..." Minerva wasn't looking at her. She had moved to the window and her fingers where tracing the patterns that the rain had formed on the glass.

"I'm still your professor… at least for a few more months. After that you will leave this castle to pursue your dreams. The thought of loosing you is more than I can take, but I will not have you risking your future for me." Minerva almost jumped as she felt two tender arms wrap around her waist from behind.

"May I speak?" The soft and loving tone in Hermione's voice destroyed every effort to keep the tears at bay.

"You will never loose me Min..." Hermione started, her soft whisper had Minerva biting her lip to keep from crying.

"There's more…" Her voice was barely audible as she took a deep breath and freed herself from Hermione's grip. She needed to steady herself for this. Her young lover's painfully sad face didn't help matters. She sighed and walked a few paces, deciding that a little distance was essential for her to get through this.

"The ministry is sending personnel to evaluate the standard of education here at Hogwarts." Hermione flinched. Not so much at the words that where spoken, but how they had reached her. Minerva had again taken on her role as Headmistress; her tone was casual at best, professional at worst. Though the raven-haired woman had only taken a few steps away from her, Hermione suddenly felt as if she where miles away.

"They will be following lessons, examining papers, talking to students and teachers alike." She spun around to face Hermione, only to find her heart break at the sight. The young woman looked destroyed and Minerva hated herself for being responsible for that heartshattering expression in those soft features. Stunned, she just stood there, not able to continue.

"What are you saying Minerva?" Hermione wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer to this, but the silence was worse yet. When the older woman still wasn't speaking, she panicked. "You can't do this…" Her whisper was cut short by the tears falling down her cheeks. Shaking her head in disbelief she looked at the woman she loved not able to hide her pain any longer. "After everything… After last nigh… You can't just leave me…"

For a moment longer Minerva was too stunned to speak, but as Hermione made an attempt for the door her voice found its way back.

She managed to grab a hold of Hermione's arm, forcing her to stay. But the brunette refused to face her.

"How can you think such a thing?" It had never crossed Minerva's mind that Hermione would ever be afraid of this. But she realised that just because this was an impossibility in her own reality, it wasn't in Hermione's. And as those deep hazel eyes turned to lock with hers she managed a small smile.

"We just need to be very careful…" Minerva said softly, stroking her lovers wet cheek.

A sudden knock on the door made them both jump, and before Minerva could react, the heavy wooden door was opened and a cheerful voice rang through the room.

"Minerva? Are you ready, we should really… Oh." Albus Dumbledore stopped mid sentence at seeing Hermione quickly wipe her cheeks and compose herself.

"I'll be right there." Minerva didn't even make an effort to hide her irritation at the rude interruption.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-" But again Dumbledore's efforts where cut short.

"I was just leaving professor." Hermione gave her lover a last hurt glance before rushing past Dumbledore out of the office. The headmaster looked after her, a sad look of understanding and guilt flashing his usually twinkling eyes. He looked over at Minerva whose expression quickly changed from pained to annoyed at meeting his gaze.

"Don't say a word." She warned and Albus held up his hands in surrender as she brushed past him, a little more forcefully then necessary.

The old man sighed before closing the large office doors. He had been afraid of this…

--------------

As the school week dawned on Hogwars a change was evident for all. It wasn't so much the whispers and rumours, or that Slytherin house suddenly seemed much more careful in dropping snide remarks to rival house Gryffindor.

On Monday morning, all students where met at breakfast by three new faces.

Most of Gryffindor already knew who these three must be, by Hermione's declaration the day before.

Dumbledore had introduced the three members of the ministry that very morning. The two women looked frightfully dull in their closely buttoned robes, strict hairdos and vacant expressions. Like old candleholders that had been tucked away in a cupboard for far too long and where now covered in dust and spider web. Or maybe they just seemed that way sitting on each side of a very handsome and beaming man in his early forties. Wearing a deep blue robe, with his light brown hair slightly out of place, he was directly the centre of attention as he laughed heartedly at professor Flitwich's jokes.

It was needless to say that the disruption that this man, introduced to the students as Mr Peter Priapus, was much to the dislike of Severus Snape who looked more disgusted than ever as the seventh year class of Gryffindors and Slytherins where about to begin their Monday morning potions class.

Priapus had been very keen to chat with the students, looking into their cauldrons and making little jokes and giving pointers. And by the end of the lesson, Snape looked if possible more pale and furious than ever.

Only one student hadn't noticed any of this. She was to busy staring vacantly into her bubbling caldron. She had followed the instructions on the black board and her potion was done. But there was no gleam of excitement in her eyes, no joy over being the only one to finish her potion. She had walked the steps in the directions as by autopilot and now that it was done, she could do nothing but stare at it. Too many things where running through her head to make her care the slightest about a silly thing like a potion.

She wouldn't even have noticed the bell ringing if it hadn't been for Ron and Harry pulling her up from her chair.

She didn't struggle. But filled an empty bottle with the potion she'd made, sighing as the bright yellow fluid filled the tiny vial.

"Hermione…" Harry tried, but didn't know what to say.

"You two go on ahead." She said, not turning to face them. She didn't need their pity-glances right now. "I'm just going to turn this in."

"Come on…" Ron dragged Harry with him, for once realizing that his friend might need a little time for herself.

Emptying the remainder of her potion and collecting her books, Hermione walked up to her professor's desk to turn in the bottle.

"Well, well…" Snape's greasy voice rang through her ears as she put the vial on his desk. "Looks like one of you actually managed to make a potion that didn't explode." She didn't even look at him, but turned to leave. "I guess Priapus didn't have the same affect on you as on old McGonagall." At the sound of Minerva's name, she froze. She could almost feel Snape's smirk burning her back.

"Would you be so kind as to inform your Head of House that I'm not going to tolerate any more interruptions in my class, especially from her old boyfriend."

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Looooooooook! The pretty button is back:) Such a good way to speed up updates… (Me? Fishing for reviews? Nooo…. Never! ...erhm...)


	15. Where are the answers?

Update! (Thank you sweetie!) And yeah, I'm evil. Things will not be easy for a while... but you know I'm a romantic at heart ;)And a Huuuuuuge thank-you to my amazing, fantastic, incredible readers and reviewers who feed my ego and keep me breathing and writing.  
Much love to you all:)

-Jellicos  
**  
**

**Chapter fifteen:Where are the answers?**

_Would you be so kind as to inform your Head of House that I'm not going to tolerate any more interruptions in my class, especially from her old boyfriend…. Her old boyfriend… Her old boyfriend…  
_The words still echoed in her head as Hermione walked into her dorm. It was only 10.30 am the morning and she had many lessons left, but for the first time since she'd stepped foot inside Hogwarts walls, she had no desire what so ever to study.

As she sat down on her four poster bed she was hollow. At least that is how she felt. As if Snape's words had plucked out her insides and left her a mere shell.

Looking down she realised that she was still carrying her books and simply dropped them to the floor. Priapus had been Minerva's boyfriend. Was that the reason why she'd said all those things?

That's when it hit. Without realising it, Hermione had started to shake uncontrollably. Then the sobs came. Within seconds she was crying out her pain, her screams so filled with hurt that even old Crookshanks hid under an old blanket on the floor.

Had anyone been in the common room they would have heard her heart breaking with every cry, every uncontrolled sob. But her house mates where all in class so the thick, cold stone walls of Hogwarts where there to keep her pain.

-----------------------

She wasn't sure what to do. As her class of seventh year Gryffindors and Slytherins had settled down and she had begun her lesson, Hermione was still nowhere to be seen. Looking over at Potter and Weasly gave her little reassurance. They looked as confused as she felt.

The boys had saved a seat for their friend and where looking over their shoulders every two seconds, then exchanging worried glances.

McGonagall had put them to work trying human transfiguration in front of a mirror. Usually that brought out a lot of laughter from them all, but the class was strangely quiet this day. Not even Priapus little jokes cracked a smile on many of her students faces as he helped Seamus Finnigan to grow a green goatee.

Walking amongst her students, correcting wand movements and pronunciation, she decided it appropriate to ask about Hermione's whereabouts. After all, she was a student, and Minerva would have asked the same question if it had been any other of her students.

"The circle movement is counter-clockwise Mr Potter." She corrected the black-haired young man who had managed to turn his left ear slightly green.

"Oh, right. Thanks professor." He said absentmindedly but didn't try again. Instead his gaze was fixed upon her and Ronald Weasly soon followed his example.

"Do you boys know where Ms Granger is? It's not like her to miss class." Minerva tried to sound as casual as always, but judging by the concerned looks her two students gave her, they knew she was worried.

"We where just wondering the same thing professor." Harry said softly. There was no doubt that he knew what was going on between his friend and his professor, and Minerva was grateful to him for his support and discretion.

"We left her to turn in her work with Snape and we haven't seen her since." Ron continued and Harry nodded his agreement.

Minerva looked at the two Gryffindors for a moment before nodding her head.

"Alright, back to work." She said, but her statement was half-hearted at most.

------------------

They watched her walk away before Ron leaned over to his friend.

"What's up with her lately?" Ron asked and Harry looked at him as if he had just asked how to spell the word 'cat'.

"Sometimes I don't know whether to slap you or send you to madam Pomfrey to have your head examined." Harry said, shaking his head at his friend.

"What!" Ron asked, obviously as offended by Harry's statement as he was oblivious to the world around him.

"Hermione isn't dating Neville, Ron." Harry sounded as if he was trying to explain the subject to a five-year-old.

"She isn't? Then who?" Ron looked at him wide-eyed as if the thought never occurred to him.

"Ron, think for a second!" He was getting impatient and in fear that when Ron finally figured out he would blow the whole secret, he led his friend harshly by the arm to a secluded part of the classroom. "There are two people who have been acting really strange these past few weeks…"

"Tell me about it! I still can't get the vision of Snape kissing Neville out of my head. It's just plain weird, you know-"

"How thick can you get!" Harry cut him off, hissing trying very hard not to physically shake some sense into his oblivious friend. "Yes, Neville is dating Snape and as much as I hate to say it, it's his choice. But I'm talking about Hermione. Haven't you noticed how she's been behaving lately?" Ron looked as if he was thinking for a moment before he replied.

"Yeah, she's been all gloomy and odd, like she'd had her heart broken or something. And she's been real funny in class too, especially in transfiguration. It's like…." Suddenly his eyes looked as if they where to pop out of his head. "Noooooo…" He whispered in disbelief.

"Yes." Harry took a firm grip around Ron's arm and pulled him closer as not to be heard by anyone else.

"You mean…" Ron looked at Harry in surprise, and then his gaze trailed towards McGonagall who was talking to the man from the ministry.

"Yes. And don't you say a word to anyone." Harry said in him utmost serious voice.

"But how… I mean, why… What?" Ron looked back at Harry and he still seemed confused.

"Look, all I know is that they are in love, they've been dating. But something seems to have gone wrong and as I can't very well go and ask McGonagall I need you to talk to your sister."

"Ginny?" Ron asked. "Why?" Harry sighed.

"You want to ask Hermione what's going on between her and McGonagall?" Harry asked.

"Point taken." Ron finally seemed to have gotten it. "I'll talk to Ginny right after class."

"Good." Harry patted his friends shoulder as they returned to their mirrors.

"I swear… This school is turning into a loony bin." Ron muttered and shook his head.

Harry couldn't argue.

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Ginny Weasly had gotten the message from her brother and her boyfriend half an hour ago. She had been sure that Ron would have had a thing or two to say about Hermione and McGonagall when he found out. But for once, her older brother had proved her wrong. In fact, he had seemed very concerned. Not just for Hermione, but for McGonagall as well.

Well, live and learn, she thought as she climbed down the stairs to the dungeons. She had been looking for Hermione since she'd gotten the message. And after combing the dormitories, the common room, the library, the great hall and the owlery, she had decided to check the dungeons before going outside. It was late autumn and cold, so she couldn't imagine that Hermione would be so dumb as to go outside. Then again, she doubted that her friend would ever hide out in the dungeons either.

And true enough, every classroom she checked was empty, except for the occasional spider webs and odd curiosa.

This was ridiculous. Hermione had to be here somewhere, but how the hell was she supposed to find her if she was hiding in this massive castle?

Ginny heard her tummy rumble and realised that skipping lunch to try and find her friend had its consequences. But she was determined to find her, so she opened one empty room after another.

She was about to give up as she heard muffled noises coming from a tiny door in the dark hallway ahead.

Relieved to finally have found her friend, Ginny hurried over to open the door, only to gasp and close it the second after. In horror she ran through the hallways and up the stairs, not stopping until she reached the entrance hall. There she could not help but to burst into laughter.

"Did you find her yet?" Came a voice from behind her. Ginny turned around, her face red from the efforts and a huge grin on her face.

"No Harry, not yet." She said, trying to compose herself, but the laughter wouldn't stop.

"What's so funny?" He asked, looking at her as if hoping to hear a very funny story. But as Ginny composed herself enough to stop laughing and had wiped the tears from her eyes, her gaze darted towards the stair to the dungeons. Harry turned and was met by two flushed and rugged looking men, both of which had their eyes fixed on Ginny.

He turned to his girlfriend just in time to see her gesture to her lips as if she was closing an imaginary sipper on them and as he realised what Ginny must have walked into he couldn't help but feel his stomach turn.

"I'd better find Hermione." Ginny said, seeing the look on Harry's face. "You go join Neville for lunch." This wasn't a suggestion Harry realised and looked slightly uncomfortable.

"He's your friend Harry; don't deny him the opportunity to be happy." She looked at him. "Ron didn't…" She'd hit the spot. Remembering how Ron had given him permission to date Ginny suddenly made Harry feel a pinch of guilt.

"Go find Hermione." He said softly, kissing his girlfriend on the cheek before turning around.

"Hey Nev! Want to grab some lunch mate?" Ginny stood for a while, watching Harry walk up to Neville. Seeing Neville's eyes light up at Harry's words, she smiled. As the two friends walked into the great hall, Ginny went out into the blistering cold.

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It felt like she'd been sitting there for hours, starring into empty space. She had no more tears left, her body was tired and her brain numb.

It was strange though, how clear-minded she felt, now drained from her pain.

'…_we just need to be very careful…'_ That's what she'd said. Minerva hadn't actually broken it off with her, just said that they had to be careful. And in all fairness, Snape wasn't the most reliable source of information.

Yet, Hermione couldn't shake the nasty feeling in her stomach at the thought of Peter Priapus.

She needed to know. If he really was Minerva's former boyfriend, what could that mean? Did he want her back? Would she want him back?

He was sort of handsome, in a very annoying way. And he did have everything that Hermione lacked in the area of age, experience, history... She was getting depressed again.

But then… Hadn't Minerva confessed her love for Hermione just yesterday?

Lost in thoughts, Hermione curled up in her hiding place. It seemed like it was years ago that she'd been sitting in this exact same place listening to Minerva and Dumbledore.

That was the night she'd found out about Lily Evans. That was the night she'd decided to fight for her love.

Was she ready to do that again?

But she knew there was only one answer to that question.

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For the first time in history, Minerva McGonagall had dismissed a class early.

Though the fourth year students had been thrilled, Minerva had hardly noticed.

It had been her last class this day and she was getting worried. Not only had Hermione missed her class, but she hadn't shown up for lunch, during which Professor Sprout had come up to ask Minerva if she knew why her always present Gryffindor student hadn't been to her Herbology class. During her seven years at Hogwarts, Hermione had never missed a class unless she'd been refrained to the hospital wing.

During her third year she had even used a time-turner to make all her classes. A device that Minerva herself had lent to her to help her in her studies.

Pacing the hallways, Minerva suddenly realised that she had no idea where to start looking for her young lover.

"Are you lost my dear?" At the familiar voice, Minerva turned.

"Peter." She greeted him with a smile. "Just the person I wanted to see."


	16. What matters in the end?

_My dearest, beloved readers and reviewers! What would I do without you?  
Ah, this is actually kind of sad...  
I know I can be really evil to our heroines, but I hope this will heal a few wounds…  
And yes, this is the last chapter of this story. But fear not. New HG/MM stories are in planning and I might just give in and be nicer to them in at least one ;)  
So thank you all for your amazing words! I hope you'll enjoy this chapter.  
And a special thank-you to Sapho's Daughter for all your help inspiration. You're just Simply the Best:)_

_Love,  
Jellicos_

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
**

**Chapter Sixteen: What matters in the end?**

She hadn't really been looking for Peter, but since he was there, he might as well be of some use. After all, he had escorted the seventh year Gryffindors through class all day.

"Ah, Minerva. Such a pleasure bumping into you." He smiled and gestured generously with his arms while Minerva wondered with a sigh what she had ever seen in this man.

"I need your help Peter." She said as briskly as she could manage. The last thing she needed right now was for Peter to get any suspicion about her intentions. Something told her that he would not take it lightly.

His flirtatious tone as he replied, confirmed her fears.

"Anything for you my darling." His smiling eyes left her for a moment to fix on a spot to the left of her and in an instant, his expression changed, leaving him oblivions to Minerva's shudder at his 'pet-name' "Are you alright my dear?" He asked the spot behind Minerva in a concerned voice.

At this she spun around quickly, only to find a teary eyed Hermione shaking her head at her slowly.

"Herm-" Minerva started carefully, but Hermione cut her off.

"No!" Her cry sent daggers through Minerva as the young woman turned at the spot and fled before the older witch could even raise her hand in protest.

"Oh dear." Peter looked a bit shocked at the outburst but shrugged it off as he turned to Minerva. "What was that all about?"

"I'm going to find out." Minerva said absentmindedly and mumbled some excuse. Of curse she knew what it was about… Or she thought she did. But for once, she really hoped she was wrong.

Hurrying after Hermione she realised that she would never catch the young witch at this pace. By now the hallways where deserted and as soon as she was out of Peter's sight, she vanished. A small tabby cat was in her place and it took off at an alarming speed in the direction that Hermione had disappeared in.

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How could she have been so stupid! Even Snape knew!

She buried her face in her arms, but every time she closed her eyes she could see them.

'My darling' he had called her. In that greasy, flirtatious voice.

She should have known! What was she to offer a woman like Minerva? She was a kid, with no experience or knowledge of the real world. Sure, she'd battled evil. She'd faced Death Eaters, trolls, even Voldemort himself at one point. She was known as the brightest witch of her age and she had more knowledge of the muggle world than most witches and wizards. But what was that compared to Mr-pretty-boy-ministry-hotshot? Apparently nothing.

"I can see you, you know." She whispered through her tears at the tabby cat lurking around the corner.

She didn't even look up as the cat transformed into her transfiguration professor.

"So this is where you've been hiding?" Minerva looked at her and glanced around the small hiding place that before now, no one except Neville knew Hermione frequented.

"You know, animangus transformation isn't playing fair." Hermione snorted.

"Neither is running away before letting a girl explain." Minerva said softly, sitting down beside Hermione.

"Sorry, I wasn't prepared to see your ex calling you darling." Hermione shot at her sarcastically as she stood up with her back to Minerva.

"You know about Peter." It wasn't a question, just a statement of regret.

"Snape asked me to give you a message about your ex boyfriend disrupting his class." Hermione didn't spare the sarcasm and hurt in her voice.

"Snape…" Minerva hissed quietly between clenched teeth. She should have known! But now was not the time.

"So this is why you've been avoiding me?" She asked Hermione softly. "Because of Peter?"

"Well it was convenient that you pretty much break things off with me the day before your pretty-boy arrives."

"That is not fair!" Minerva was standing, her voice trembling.

"Not fair!" Hermione turned. In facing Minerva her tears started to well up again, her fists clenched into knots. "You are breaking my heart and then you have the nerve to complain that things are not fair!" She was yelling and she didn't care. The whole world could know and she didn't care. This was too much. This excruciating pain had been kept locked in and now it had nowhere to go but out.

She didn't care who heard her, she didn't care who saw her cry. Her heart was breaking, literally breaking in half, and she couldn't take it anymore.

"Hermione, I-" Minerva tried. She reached out, but Hermione brushed her hand away as if it was toxic.

"Just go." She hissed, but Minerva didn't move. "Go!" She yelled.

"No." It was so soft, but even more determined. "No, I'm not making that mistake again." Minerva walked towards her, ever so slowly. "I have been running from this for far too long now. Running from you, from my feelings… from us." She emphasised the last word as she stood, now only inches from Hermione. The brunette was looking up at her. Her arms where still crossed over her chest, her eyes still wet from tears. But she was looking at her.

"Peter was… a mistake I made a long time ago." Minerva sighed. "We are still friends, but there will never be anything else." She locked eyes with Hermione, needing her to realise the sincerity in what she was about to say.

"I am scared Hermione." She confessed in a trembling voice. "I've never felt like this before and I fear I might break in half when you leave school." She paused to see if Hermione was really listening, if she herself had the nerve to say what she was about to admit. But the pain in the young woman's deep brown eyes was all she needed to continue.

"But I realised that not giving us this chance will hurt even more, and haunt me for the rest of my life. There may be obstacles in our way, and distances in the future. There may be pain and frustration and sacrifices to make. But I am drawn to you in a way I cannot possibly explain. Rules, right or wrong be damned! I don't want to fight this anymore. I can't fight it. Allowed or not, I love you Hermione Granger. And I will fight for you if need be." Inhaling deeply after her heated speech, Minerva looked at the woman she loved and as the sight filled her, tears moistened her eyes.

"Oh, Minerva." Hermione was at a loss for words. Everything she felt had been said by the stunning beauty in front of her and all she could think of was to show her that.

She surprised Minerva when she pulled the older woman towards her catching her lips with her own as if those lips held the key to her life. And in a way they did. Arms where wrapped around bodies. Cloaks draped over each other and two people vanished from the world outside as their bodies seemed to melt together. No one was ever to tell them something so right was not allowed.

They both knew there would be issues to deal with. Hiding their relationship until graduation, how to cope when Hermione left school for further studying, not to mention the war raging outside. But none of this mattered now. They would find a way. Day by day, week by week, they had all the time in the world. And as long as they where together, there was nothing they couldn't handle.

Besides… if Snape couldn't break them up, what chance did the rest of the world have?

And at last Hermione Granger knew what lie beyond the surface of one Professor Minerva McGonagall. And she loved it all…

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_There it is… The End._


End file.
